This Just Doesn't Happen To Fans (Cheryl Cole Fanfic)

Chapter 31

Sat on the icy bench that I and Cheryl had shared one of our first magical moments, I stared up at the stars through the thick fog. I had tears clouding my vision so it was even harder to focus. The wind was bitter and the tips of my fingers were stinging with the cold. My teeth were chattering and my whole body was shuddering. At that point, I didn’t care. It was peaceful and I was starting to recap all the emotion that had whizzed over me, the past few days, especially today.

‘Babe... why are yas out here? It’s freezin’!’ I heard a gentle voice coming from behind me whilst I felt warm hands on my shoulders.

‘Why do you care?’ I blurted out but kept my eyes fixed on the distant stars hoping I didn’t offend with my sharp words.

Without another word mentioned, Cheryl sat down beside me. She kept her hands to herself but I could feel her stare burning on my skin. She must have ignored the tone of which I had just spoken to her in because when she replied, she was much calmer than me.

‘Because I love yas and you’re me girlfriend...’

Nothing was said for the next ten minutes. Cheryl had moved her gorgeous eyes from me and gazed up to the stars with me. I felt an awkwardness that I had felt for the frist time since being captured by this beauty.

‘Nic?’

‘Hmm?’ I mumbled.

‘W-Wh-What’s up with y-your dad?’ The Geordie stammered over her words.

‘What?!’ I stood up now raising my voice again.

‘Well err... Frankie mentioned your dad is really poorly and well I want to help somehow if I can.’

I turned to Cheryl and fixed my harsh stare on her now innocent face looking deep into her eyes. I had melted once again but my anger got the better of me. I just needed today to be over with.

‘You are joking me right?’ I almost laughed.

Cheryl showed no signs of comical expression. In fact she had tears in her eyes but she wasn’t going to break. She was that brave woman she had portrayed to her soldiers. The beauty actually was courageous and strong.

I took a deep breath before carrying on, hoping it would stop my anger but it never did.

‘I have had the worst possible day ever! I can’t pursue my dreams anymore. I can’t live out my dreams. How would you feel if someone took your voice away?!’

‘I-I never thought ab-‘ Cheryl started stumbling across her carefully chosen vocabulary before I interrupted her.

‘Exactly, you don’t do you? No one stops to think how I feel! We’ve argued all day and most of the night and you bring up the last thing I really want to think about, let alone speak about!’

By this point, Cheryl’s eyes were spilling with tears and streaming halfway down her cheeks but she showed no emotion.

‘Nicole, I just want to help you.’

‘But you can’t! Your money, your fame, it won’t make my dad any better. Maybe you just think pining your money onto him might make him okay?!’

Cheryl started to get aggressive. Quickly she stood up and faced me. We were so close it scared me. I knew Cheryl would never hurt me but after what I had been through with Alex, I was actually shitting bricks.

‘Well maybe if yas jus’ fuckin’ shut up for one second and realise I’m here to look after yas and make yas feel better then maybe you’ll realise that I would fuckin’ do anythin’ to make yous and ya family happy! If your dad needs treatment that no one in ya family can afford, then I’ll fuckin’ pay it because that’s what your worth to us!’

I bit my tongue to stop myself saying things that I would regret in the morning.

‘Stop swearing at me!’ My voice started to shake but I wasn’t going to show the fear in my face.

‘Well for fuck sakes will yas just open up to us. I’ve tried reassuring yas so much that I won’t betray yous and yous still don’t trust us!’

By this time, Cheryl was ranting and raving. Her hands were all over the place, just millimetres away from my skin. I was really starting to think that she was going to hit me. My eyes started watering, my hands were trembling, but this time not with the cold. With that, I started to cry and the only words that I could find was:

‘You’re scaring me.’

My voice was soft and sincere, almost like a helpless cry. I strolled passed the angry Geordie as I heard

‘Ah shit... Nic... babe... I’m sorry.’ As Cheryl started to follow me into the house.

‘It’s okay. It was my own fault anyway.’

‘Stop blamin’ yourself for everythin’ Nic’

‘This is my fault.’ I whispered, climbing the stairs to the guest bedroom.

I got to the door and the beauty grabbed my arm quite hard. ‘Stop walkin’ away from your problems. They won’t go away!’ She raised her voice again.

‘Please.. you’re really scaring me. Let me go.’ I whispered in my shaking teary voice.

Finally, Cheryl loosened her grip and instantly, I closed the door and locked it from the inside.

**

Waking up the next morning without Cheryl next to me was a killer. For the past few nights I had felt her soft silky skin against me, and her warm breath relaxing me. Being in a cold bed alone wasn’t right.

For the next half an hour I was hesitating whether to show my face or not. But my head was feeling like someone had jumped on my skull with steel toe cap boots on. So I decided to risk it.

Quietly, I headed into the kitchen where Cheryl was on tweeting or texting on her phone. I tried to tiptoe across the big room, trying to open cupboards and drawers as quiet as a mouse but then I heard.

‘What yas lookin’ for babe? Better not be alcohol..’ Cheryl was calm when she spoke but I couldn’t help thinking about what had happened the previous night.

‘I’m looking for err painkillers.’ I asked politely.

Cheryl’s eyes never left mine. They looked so helpless and like she was going to cry.