Dear Future Husband

December 27, 2018

Dear Future Husband,

Two boyfriend meets in under a month seemed like a lot for my family, but I guess that's just what you get when Clarissa is a cheating pig.

Tonight we get to meet Brad, Clarissa's new boyfriend that she was with before she even broke up with Grant, but my parents don't know that part.

She told her story to us the day that Grant came over to get his things. She had come sobbing down the stairs telling my dad in Oscar -winning acting that she needed to change schools because of Grant.

"He kept trying to have sex with me! I kept telling him no but he always persisted a-and he almost raped me once! You should've seen him I thought he would rape me! He got mad because I ended it with him and came over today and wouldn't leave me alone! I thought he was going to break the windows! I was so scared!" If only that was the truth. I heard some guys talking about how Brad had been having sex with her for almost a month and Grant had just now found out.  I'm sure what really happened was Grant didn't want to have sex with her so she went off to find someone who would. Poor Grant, he didn't deserve her, and he doesn't deserved to have his name dragged in the dirt.

My dad shook his head with anger and disapproval. "I always knew there was something up with that kid. You did the right thing, sweetheart, I'm proud of you."

She smiled weakly, mascara dripping down her face like hot tar as she nodded.

I was setting the table when the doorbell rang and Clarissa introduced Brad to my parents. I barely knew him but I hated him from the start with that big cocky grin and douchebag haircut. Anyone named Brad was bound to be a douchebag. Brad just sounded like someone who was never going anywhere in life, and this guy further proved my point.

Clarissa had taken notes from Donovan and passed them onto Brad so he would leave a good impression, but I could see behind the act by the way he didn't always hold eye contact and groped Clarissa's ass not too subtly every now and then, plus his fly was open.

Clarissa had trained him pretty well though, and he seemed to be taking the advice well too. He didn't take too much spaghetti and though he had his moments, didn't eat like a barbarian the whole time (Spaghetti has always been the "booby trap" food my parents serve to check manners). He didn't make too much conversation about himself at dinner and always carried on conversations my dad brought up for way too long. The boy had no charisma and the last shreds of his intelligence had flown out through his zipper.

He made it through the dinner and I would say all was going well for him so far--he didn't pass with flying colors like Donovan but my parents were satisfied-- until the final test: dishes.

I stood to start clearing the dishes and I noticed Clarissa nudging him suggestively, both of my parents staring at him like birds spying an injured worm. He didn't seem to take the hint and I quickly cleared all of the plates before he had a chance to redeem himself. That was one large check on the bad boyfriend list and it would not go unnoticed.

Most guys could offer to clear the dishes without the gentle nudge to do it, and usually if you failed most of the dinner, you were usually redeemed by the dishes. My parents were big on selflessness and being helpful, even if it was a small gesture.

Unfortunately, my parents still liked him and he left with a "It was nice meeting you." Which was the approval phrase. Clarissa grinned and my heart sank. If only they knew the truth.

I wish they had heard what I heard after dinner.

I was taking out the trash as Clarissa walked Brad out to his car and couldn't help but pick up on their conversation.

"Why didn't you offer to do the dishes?" She hissed.

"Babe, will you calm down? I did everything else you wanted tonight. I didn't want to come to this dinner in the first place and I think I did pretty well. Now you owe me anal we made a deal."

Clarissa scoffed. "We went over the dishes, Brad."

"Yeah I know, but I'm not giving up my manhood and pride to do some dishes."

"What do you mean?"

He pushed his face down close to hers, but not in a cute boyfriend way, like an intimidating "I'm going to punch you in the face" way, and Clarissa looked genuinely scared. "A man's place isn't in the kitchen."

He opened his car door then slammed it shut angrily, Clarissa taking a few steps away from the brown Jeep as he started the car, rolling the window down.

"Saturday night," He smiled at her, pretending like he hadn't just been a complete jerk. "I'm hitting it from the back, and you're going to love it." With one last wink, he pulled out of the driveway and screeched off into the night.

That just crossed a line for me. Clarissa might have not deserved Grant, but she did not deserve to be treated like dirt from Brad. He was such a patriarchist with twisted views on what being a "man" was, and he was not one. He was just using her for sex and I didn't know why she couldn't see that. Maybe she could see that...

You're never going to pull anything like that on me, I swear that to you.

Xoxo, Alina