You Don't Know

45

*Luke*

My grip hardened on the steering wheel and I pulled it to the right avoiding the truck on the last minute. 

I stopped the car on the sideway and let out a breath not able to take my hands off the steering wheel. I was panting and sweating. I looked at Evelyn next to me and she was pulling at the sides of her seat, eyes wide open.

_ I'm... sorry! I didn't see it coming... Are you okay?  I whispered searching for her eyes.

_ I'm fine, she said curtly not looking at me in the eye.

She unbuckled her seat belt, opened the door and got out of the car.

What was she so mad about? 

I followed her.

_ Ev... What's wrong? I asked quietly.

She didn't answer. I tried to take a look at her face but I couldn't.

_ I... I only tought that we could convince your uncle to let us visit her again... Maybe if we talk to him... I mumbled.

_ Why is this so important to you? She snapped interrupting me.  

She caught me off guard. She seemed really angry. I've never seen her like this before. She was always in a playful mood. That's a first.

_ And don't tell me because you're curious about Joy's life or because you're interested in the book because we already know that's nothing but a big lie! She said her voice wavering.

Was she about to cry? What the hell is happening?

_ I thought that was why you were doing this too, I stated.

_ Typical Luke, she chuckled dryly, I lied to you Luke! It's true, I like the book it's my favourite, but that's not why I wanted to keep doing this. I like you! And I know that you love Peach but I thought maybe you started to forget about her. At first, I thought maybe... just maybe, these researches were just an excuse to spend more time together... But now I realized that's not the case! She sniffed.

My heart started pounding fast. Evelyn liked me? For God's sake! How? When?

_ I... I'm sorry Ev... I didn't know, I stuttered not sure what to do or say.

_ Just tell me why? Why do you care so much about Joy's life? She murmured looking at me with her puffed eyes.

This is all my fault! I made her cry. Why am I so stupid? Why do I keep ruining everything? Why do I keep hurting the people I care about the most! 

_ I'm an asshole! I exhaled running both my hands through my hair, I should've told you this from the beginning but because I'm a selfish coward I didn't. I thought you wouldn't stay with me and I was in need for your help! But even this does not make me less guilty, I blurted out looking down at my feet.

Then I looked at her in the eye and she was patiently waiting for me to speak.

_ Remember Ashton Irwin? The guy that Peach likes? I asked her my heart shattering at the second part of my question.

She nodded knitting her eyebrows confused.

_ He's Joy Reed's son. And I thought maybe with digging in his past I'd be able to prove to Peach that he's a bad guy, I explained.

She didn't seem surprised. Instead, I think I spotted hurt in her eyes.

_ So, this was all about Peach, she stated her voice shaking.

_ I... I started saying but I was out of words. 

Evelyn walked back to the car silently and got in the passenger seat leaving me behind.

I followed her trying to form a sentence, a word to tell her but nothing came out.

She turned on the music and I started the car realizing that this can be our last ride together.

As the car moved forward, the dark swallowed the road behind us. Evelyn didn't look at me, not even once. And since the hurt I get seeing her this way was not enough for Karma, the song playing on the radio station was "I can't make you love me". Bonnie Raitt's voice was scolding me over and over again and I knew I deserved it because I'm the biggest jerk on this earth.

I pulled over in Evelyn's parking lot. She opened the door but she didn't get out of the car right away.

_ Good bye, Luke, she said quietly without looking at me then she left me in the small space of my car alone. 

I waited for her until she reached her doorway. I was hoping that she'll turn to me one last time but she didn't. She closed the door behind her and I collapsed on my steering wheel.

I stayed like this for a while then I looked at my reflection in the rearview mirror.

"Great work you stupid fucking prick!" I whispered.