Fat Girls Romance

just words

"I set my friends on fire

And watch them all lit up

Welcome to my empire

Where everybody's fucked up"

-Escape The Fate, "Empire"

      Have you ever wanted to throw yourself out a window and just splatter on the ground? Life would be so much easier that way wouldn't it? But every day we keep fighting and trying and nothing ever gets better. But we still fight anyway. I am at the point where I am wondering why I am still fighting. It seems like no matter what, something goes wrong. I mean I write these thoughts, I shut people out, I lie to everyone, and I have convinced myself my friends are just pretend. There is a cycle and it all leads back to me being fucked up. The world is on fire and I am watching everyone freak out and I can't move because I don't know where to run. 

      That boy I like. I saw him in the hallway and got so distracted, I forgot what class I was going to. I went past the staircase to my Spanish class. My friend had to pull me toward it. I made up some lie about trying to skip out of the quiz we were about to have. I think she bought it. It was really embarrassing though. Have you ever liked someone so much that when you saw them you forgot where the fuck you were going? No? Well, it is not fun. I am so lucky my friend was there or I would probably be sitting in English instead of Spanish right now. I am so confused lately. It is like when no one thing comes to an end another one starts. It is like a video game. When one life ends, another one begins. 

      That person in rehab is coming home tomorrow. I hope I have a snow day so I can go pick him up with my mom. I will even take a half-day. I just want t to be there to see his face when he finally gets out. It has been 33 days since he has been home. He has not seen his pets or his family. I can not imagine how hard that must be. 

Onlinegirl0404 becoming Offlinegirl0404 PEACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!