Lucid dreams

Lucid Dreams 95

Some minutes later, laying on the bed staring at the ceiling with Vikky laying on me breathing slowly,my left hand in the hair of her head on my chest.
I smile to myself as the scent of her hair is blown into my nostrils.
Is this it? My mind asks.
Is this what? I ask back.
Is this the end? Is this your happy ending?
My eyes rolled round the ceiling as if I was searching for answers.
What about her mum? My mind continued questioning, She would still  have to go for her dad's burial you know?
What if her mum wins her over and she decides not to come back..?
"Baby?" Vikky spoke.
I didn't respond, I thought she was sleeping already.
"What's up?" she asked without taking her head from my chest..
"Nothing" I replied
"Your heart beat changed from normal to fast.." she said raising up her head to look at my eyes and her face went from curious to shock as she did,i guess my facial expression wasn't good..
"You scared B" she said in a way that sounded like a question and like an answer..
"It nothing really, just some crazy th.." I tried to wave it aside..
"Naan, I wanna know,." She cut in coming to a sitting position. "Please?"
"Alright," I began "I'm scared yeah, kind of.."
"Of?" she asked looking at me in the face.
I turned my face away and sat up too and stared at my legs.
"What if your mom finds a way of making you not come back?" I asked not wanting to look at her.
"what if she and your elder brother find a way to convince you to go abroad and continue your education?, what if I never s..." I stopped, not wanting to complete my question...
I was expecting her to answer or say something but she was just quiet..
I turned to look at her in surprise and saw the look on her face.
Turned out she may not have thought of that until now.
I nodded my head trying to act fine but I wasn't fine at all, no, my body was begging to shake and I could almost hear my own heart beat.
I got up from the bed and walked towards the door still she didn't say a word.
I guess she didn't know what to say..
I stopped and turned to see her still sitting on the bed eyes wide with fear, I saw my legs walking back towards her avoiding her eyes that kept watching me in fear.
I sat back on the bed,.. "Hey," I started, taking her hand in mine and gradually turning to face her"I don't wanna lose you baby" I confessed to her,I saw her eyes get watery, she hurried to look away as a tear fell..
"I sorry" she started slowly in what sounded like a whisper.. "You're right..., I'm going to go to attend my dad's funeral and my mum and brother and other relatives and sympathizers would suggest I don't come back all thanks to the accident I was involved in too.." she stopped.
All the while she spoke, my eyes watched her in horror and it was as if the pain I was about to get was hanging over me in a transparent balloon waiting for her to say the word that would break my heart.
"What ever happens" she continued without looking at me.. "Know that I would try and get back to you, but if they win and I don't come back..." she stopped again.
My heart was beating faster now, like it was going to jump out and burst..
I knew what she was going to say but still wanted to hear her say it.
"If I don't come back Barney" She turned to look at me as she continued.. "Know that I would always love you but we'd have to move on"...
That was it, I just felt as if all the lights in my head were blown off and I was thrown in total darkness..
She looked at me, searching my eyes for answers and reactions, emotions and...
"I'm sorry" she added..
I nodded and stood from the bed fighting the tears and the urge to scream and punch something, walked slowly towards the door slowly like someone who just rose from the dead..
I turned back again to look at her.. I wanted to tell her something but I just lost the words..
I walked out