After Action [COMPLETED]

[SE] "LIVING BURDEN"

Written 09 December 2019

It's kinda ironic that my dad wants me to get out of the house because I'm "a living burden" in his life, only for him to remind me that I should go back home later for tomorrow's errand.Now that I've decided to spend the night at my local haunt to cool myself down―I can feel that at any given time I will coldly snap and punch my dad in the face, what with the unnatural numbness on my part―not even he would stop me from doing so. (I'll still do what he's ordering me for tomorrow, so I'll just stay wide awake.)

Everything I'm doing for his so-called business venture―quality control, logistics, encoding―is what I can only call "consuelo de bobo". (I've got to thank the Filipino Freethinkers group for that term.) He's not even asking what I truly wanted to do in life: to become a writer. Hell, he never even considered my suggestion of journalism for my college course, nor he considered my other option of enrolling myself on a creative writing course, which is relatively closer to my aspiration. In fact, both my parents wanted me to enroll on a two-year IT course, just because it was the hottest trend back then.

I objectively know that building the rig I've always dreamed of will be just that: a distant dream. There's no need for him to remind me of that. And at this point, he's not being helpful on my lingering frustrations as an aspiring writer ("struggling" is a more apt term). If he thinks he's doing this Internet "mercenary" a favor by inserting me to a business venture I want no part of . . . he's dead wrong on that one.