"It's getting harder each day, so much harder. It drains me to have to constantly put up a mask, hiding how I really feel behind a smile that isn't even true. I don't think I'll ever find that easy, because it's not. The easy part for me is lying, i...
Today was the wedding, the day I both looked forward to and dreaded. Today was the day that my mother would marry a man that made her happy, but she would also leave behind the man that once was. Today she would become step mother of four new kids, but she'd leave behind the one she lost.
Today is the wedding, the day my mother will finally move on, she'll finally let herself enjoy life instead of hanging behind like me. But me, I'll never let go. I can't move on, not yet at least. I could never forget my father, he was a great man. He might be dead but he was always there for me, he was always so caring and compassionate to me. He always made sure I was happy and would cheer me up if I was sad.
I get new brothers today, four of them. That doesn't mean I'll forget my brother, I can't forget him. He was the biggest part of my life, he still is. Never in my entire life will I forget him, having four won't change a thing.
Mom might be starting a new chapter of her life, she might be moving on. But me... I've yet to finish this chapter, I'm not sure it will even end.
"You may now kiss the bride"
Those six words changed my life, I'm apart of a full family again. Harrison is the only one that accepts me, my new "brothers" don't.
I looked up, seeing my mother happily dancing with Harrison. She had a smile on her face that I hadn't seen in seven years. She was finally happy, she was happy again and that should make me happy...
But it didn't.
I couldn't help but feel like we were betraying dad, that we were forgetting my brother. Tears welled in my eyes as I thought about them, about that day seven years ago. It was all my fault, all my fucking fault. Now they are gone, mom has moved on and I'm stuck dwelling on the past, my guilt pulling me down whilst mom strives on her happiness.
I stood up, walked away from the wedding. People called out to me but I completely ignored them. I just left. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't need to. My legs took me where my mind wanted to go, somewhere peaceful and quiet.
So that's where I now find myself, on a peaceful beach. The only sound around me is the crashing waves against the soft sand.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I sat down on the sand, the sand falling through my fingers as the cold water touched my toes. Tears silently fell down my face as I looked out over the ocean, the sunset reflecting off of the waves. The sight was beautiful.
I don't know how long I was sat there for until I heard a car pull up, multiple doors opened and closed. I could hear someone running over to me, next thing I know, arms were draped around my shoulders, pulling me into someone's chest. "Thank god we found you Cooper! You've been gone for two hours! Why did you leave?!" Mom cried and also shouted at me, I didn't answer, instead I pushed myself away from her, sitting back on the sand.
