𝐻𝑖𝑠 𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒, 𝐻𝑖𝑠 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒

~"I love you"~

I woke up at about 11, luckily it was Saturday today. The rest of the week had gone by usually, I got notes in my locker, harsh words from nearly everyone from school and Zeke has ganged up on me a couple of times.

I got up and got in the shower, washing my hair and body before getting out. I stood in front of the sink as I dried my hair, I threw the towel into the dirty laundry basket before reapplying some clean bandages to my arms.

Yeah, I've been cutting a lot more, nearly every night and it's honestly exhausting. But I can't help it... as the days go by, I'm wishing more and more that I could just pass on, move on to the afterlife. And so... every day, I've been hurting myself, the closer I'll ever get. Because as much as I want to, I can't bring myself to do it...

I can't kill myself...

But I guess that's a good thing right? That I can't bring myself to do it... right? I know it's still bad that I'm hurting myself, and that it's become more frequent... but it's the only way to calm them down.

I went back into my bedroom after wrapping my arms. I pulled out some Black jeans, a white long sleeved thermal and a blue Shinedown shirt. The white shirt went past my hands, so no one should notice my arms.

I made my way downstairs, wondering why no one else seemed to be awake, all of the lights were off and all of the curtains were closed. I let out a sigh as I made my way into the living room, the lights all went on. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" Everyone shouted at once, I jumped back, scared slightly.

Mom, Harrison, Damian, Carlos, James, Blake and Xavier stood in the living room. Everyone except for Xavier had a smile on their faces, Xavier just looked bored. Usually I'd have a smile, but I felt a frown form on my face as I looked at everyone in front of me.

I looked down at my wrist, the bracelet I had gotten for Jax and I. "It doesn't feel right..." I muttered, not looking anyone in the eyes. "Don't be a dick Cooper, we got up early to do this for you. Don't be an ungrateful ass!" Xavier sneered out at me. I shook my head, feeling tears in my eyes.

I looked up, looking mom directly in the eyes as I spoke. "This isn't right... I don't deserve this. This shouldn't be my birthday... it should be our birthday... he should be here with me... you know I hate my birthday mom..." I said, it was true. I hated my birthday because it reminded me that I should be celebrating it with my other half, but once again, he's gone. Forever.

"I appreciate this, I really do. You guys went out of your way to do this but... I don't like my birthday. I hate my birthday, but that has nothing to do with you guys. But, I won't be an ass, I won't be ungrateful. For once, I'll try and enjoy my birthday." I said, breaking out into a smile. Damian let out a sigh as he rushed over to me, giving me a bro hug. "Thank God you agreed, I thought I was going to have to hit you upside the head." Damian joked, causing me to laugh.

Damian moved away, my three step brothers came forward, giving me hugs. Then Harrison. Of course, Xavier refused but I didn't care, he's an ass anyway. When Harrison moved away, I stared at mom. Over Christmas, I had grown slightly taller, meaning mom now reached my chin.

I opened up my arms, mom smiled as she walked over to me, pulling me into a hug. "I love you mom, so so much." I whispered into her ear, holding her tightly. "I love you too sweetie, so so much." She said back, I felt her pat my head, causing me to laugh slightly.

After hugs, everyone gave me a present. James got me a bunch of art supplies and a new sketch pad. Blake got me this cool hover board, it was black with blue lights on the front. Carlos got me a camera, I looked at him confused. "I saw some of the photos you took, you would make a good photographer." He said with a smile, I gave him a hug as I looked at the camera.

Xavier got me some new shoes, I still gave him a smile either way. At least he tried. Next, Harrison gave me a PS4 with a few games including Shadow of the Colossus, Uncharted 1-4, Bloodborne and Borderlands 1,2 and 3. I gave Harrison a bright smile, giving him a small hug before Damian stepped forward.

"Now... this gift costed a lot of money for me... and I'm just returning the favour... so you better be fucking grateful you ass." He said, trying to be as serious as he could. I let out a chuckle as he handed me the card. I looked between the card and him, I could see him looking hopefully. "Did this cost you five bucks?"

"Just open the damned card you ass!!" He said, I let out a laugh as I opened the card. I went silent as my jaw dropped. I looked at the three tickets in the card, Shinedown concert tickets, for August. I looked up at Damian. "You can't be serious..."

"Oh I'm serious... the third one it's... a spare." He said, a sad tone to his voice as he said that. I knew that he had obviously bought the third ticket for Felicity... but things change. I ran over to him, pulling him into a hug. "You are honestly the bestest friend ever." I said, he let out a chuckle. "I thought Felicity was your best friend..." Xavier said, that caused everyone to look at me. "I can have two best friends asshole, besides, Damian got me something other than shoes." Xavier let out a growl as he walked away, leaving the rest of us in the living room.

"Now, we saved the best for last." They said, I turned to mom. She pulled out a small box, handing it to me. I pulled off the ribbon, letting it fall to the ground as I opened the box. There sat a key with the ford logo on it.

I looked at everyone confused, mom gave me a smile as she pointed to the front door. I made my way outside, opening the front door to see a brand new, Matte black Ford GT. My mouth hit the ground, but I could feel a smile forming on my face.

Maybe my birthday won't be so bad after all...