"It's getting harder each day, so much harder. It drains me to have to constantly put up a mask, hiding how I really feel behind a smile that isn't even true. I don't think I'll ever find that easy, because it's not. The easy part for me is lying, i...
We were currently sitting in art, Miss Nelson had asked us to draw something to do with nature, so I drew my favourite flower.
The Amaryllis flower.
I drew every detail, from the moss green stem to the red tips of each petal. I drew the vibrant yellow in the middle of the flower, the small red bud sticking out from it. I'm not quite sure what it's called...
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Miss Nelson came around, inspecting everyone's drawings. Once she saw mine, a smile bloomed over her face. "Now! Everyone, I would just like to show you Cooper's drawing. This drawing is of an Amaryllis flower, the way he's captured the realism of the flower, that's what we are aiming for in art this year." Miss Nelson said, she handed my paper back to me.
"How much do you know about the Amaryllis flower?" Miss asked, I took a deep breath, searching my mind for what I knew about the flower. "Uh... well, the Amaryllis is a flower with two species, the most commonly known one is the Amaryllis belladonna, which is a native of the West cape region of South Africa. The other species is the Amaryllis paradisicola Snijman. Oh, uh... there are more than Six hundred varieties of Amaryllis now. Amaryllis flowers bloom in Spring and Summer, and they can also be known as a Belladonna lily."
A few people seemed impressed with what I had said, even Felicity seemed shocked but she quickly covered it up. "Anything else you want to say about the flower?" Miss asked, I nodded my head, a small smile on my face. "The Amaryllis is a beautiful flower... far too pure and innocent for this world..." I said, looking at Felicity directly as I spoke, a glint of anger in my eyes.
Class went on normally after that, Felicity kept glancing at me every so often, she was probably just trying to piss me off. Well, it was working. I let out a sigh as I started to draw again, a picture of a girl crying, one wing hanging loosely behind her while the other lay dead before her...
A fallen angel.
I started to write in the page, the words just coming naturally, the song echoing in my head. "I was right beside you when you went to hell and back again..." I wrote, I scrunched up the page before throwing it at Felicity. The paper hit her head, falling to the ground. She reached down and picked it up, she looked around the room before her eyes met mine.
The bell rang, I grabbed my bag, leaving the classroom as fast as I could. Damian followed me as we made our way to the back of the school, near a tree where no one else would go. Damian started to eat while I pulled out a cigarette, lighting it and taking a large puff.
"What did you throw at Felicity?" Damian asked, causing me to look at him. "A drawing."
"Of?"
"A Fallen angel... she'll understand." I took another puff of the cigarette, I felt my eyes get heavy, my body begging for sleep. "Damian?"
"Yeah?"
"When we get home... promise me you'll knock me out."
"I beg your pardon?!" Damian said as he turned to look at me, he's eyes the size of soccer balls. "I need you to knock me out, I haven't slept in a week and I feel like I'm going crazy... well... crazier than I already am. Just please... I need sleep... bad!"
Damian thought for a moment, looking at me before nodding his head. "Okay... but how?"
"Xavier has a metal baseball bat... just pick it up, thonk! I'm out cold and asleep, you can play on my computer or some shit." I said, making it sound so easy. "Fine, but I'm apologising in advance."
"Don't apologise, just make sure you hit me hard enough to knock me out."
~~
Once school ended, Damian and I made our way back to my house. I unlocked the door and we walked inside, we went straight upstairs, I threw my bag into my room while Damian went into Xavier's room to find the bat.
I changed into some tracksuit pants and a loose hoodie, putting the hood up as I stood in front of my bed. Damian came back a minute later, holding the metal baseball bat in his hand. "Okay... not gonna lie... I feel like Steve from Stranger things." He said, causing me to chuckle.
"Just hurry up and hit me, I just want to sleep." I said, Damian walked over, standing behind me as he held the bat in his hands. "Well... sweet dreams!"
"FUCK!!!"
I fell onto the bed, clutching my head as pain washed through me. I heard Damian gasp, dropping the bat as he ran over to see if I was okay. "Shit!! I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you!!"
"I don't think you could have made it any harder without actually knocking me out... Jesus fucking Christ that hurt so fucking bad!!" I groaned, feeling tears prick my eyes at the horrible pain in my head.
"I-I thought it would work..." Damian muttered, I went to answer but we heard the door open. Damian and I made our way downstairs, my head still in my hands as we saw Blake and Xavier walk in. "Oh thank fuck! I need a favour from one of you." I said, they both looked over, a confused look crossing over their faces as they say me holding my head.
"What do you need? And why are you holding your head?" Blake asked, I heard Damian let out a nervous laugh. "I asked Damian to knock me out... he couldn't have made it any harder without knocking me out." I said, letting out a groan as my head pounded.
"He tried to knock you out?"
"I haven't slept in a fucking week so I asked him to take the metal bat and knock me out. He hit me hard but not hard enough to knock me out." I said, I heard Xavier let out a laugh while Blake winced.
"Do you want one of us to knock you out?" Blake asked, I just nodded my head. "I'll do it." Blake said, standing up and walking upstairs with me. Once we got in, I leant against my bed, my head throbbing as I heard Blake pick up the bat. "I'm sorry in advance-"
"JUST FUCKING DO IT!!" Blake swing the bat, the metal colliding with my head. I flopped down onto the bed, black dots beginning to clog my vision as I could feel myself losing consciousness. I crawled under my blanket as quickly as I could, resting my head on the pillow as the darkness finally pulled me under.
