TW: Suicidal Thoughts
Kaka-uwi niya lang galing ng office. What a day. From 3 days of vacay to a day full of surprises. Naging masaya siya eh. Eto yung resulta— sadness. Hindi ba siya pwedeng maging masaya na lang? From an epic lunch with Ashur to her father's hurtful words.
Pwede bang maging butterfly na siya? She wants to talked to someone. Pero wala si Serenity. Nasa isang transaction ito ngayon sa London. She can't disturb her. Malalaman na naman ng Daddy niya. Sasabihin na naman nito na wala siyang ginawa na tama. Hay. What a life.
She wants peace but they don't want to give her peace. Puro na lang... act right and do right.
She's browsing on her facebook. And nakita niya na may party ngayong gabi. She wants to go and get wasted. But then again, her father's words ring in her ears... "you're a disgrace."
Napa-tawa siya sa naalala niya. She's the heir. Dahil hindi pwede ang mga kapatid niya. Her father cherish her siblings— so much. Pero siya... hindi niya alam kung bakit hindi... o baka alam niya.
She needs her family. But her family only needs her when it comes to business, mafia and money. Maliban sa tatlong 'yon? Wala na. She smiled bitterly.
Kumuha na lang siya ng bucket of beer sa ref. Dito na lang siya iinom sa penthouse niya. Tutal wala naman sa kanyang makaka-kita. Maliban sa apat na sulok ng malaking penthouse na 'to. She laughed on her thoughts. Wala nga pala siyang sandalan... siya lang mag-isa.
Andito siya sa balcony sa tapat ng living room area. May upuan pero mas ginusto niya na ma-upo sa sahig. She wants to feel the cold air and tiles. Tutal wala naman tumatanggap sa kanya na init— pagmamahal o pagyakap man lang.
Her anxiety is acting up— again. Bawal siyang ma-stress. Her anxiety has many triggers— her father is number 1. Ginawa naman niya ang lahat... pero wala pa rin.
She's been fighting it for years now. And she's so damn tired. She wants to give up. Kung wala lang siyang pinangakuan. She smiled while looking at the moon. She tried to reach it pero hindi niya maabot— tulad ng pamilya niya. So near yet so far.
Hindi na niya mabilang kung naka-ilang inom na siya ng beer. Pero kahit anong inom niya. Masakit pa rin ang puso niya. She wants to cry. Pero walang lumalabas na luha sa mga mata niya. Manhid na ata siya.
Pero kung manhid na s'ya bakit ang sakit-sakit ng nararamdaman niya.
She's drunk. She knew it. But, when you're drunk. You do stupid things, right? And that is... to call your darn ex.
"Hello?" sagot nito. Pero hindi siya umimik. "Airish? Are you there?"
Hindi pa rin siya sumasagot.
"Hello? Are you okay?" tanong nito. Maayos naman ang pagka-tanong nito. Pero bakit siya nai-iyak? "Airish?" suminghot siya. "Hey... are you crying?" mahinahon na tanong nito.
And she cried. Umiiyak siya. Umiiyak siya sa sakit. She has no one. Bumabalik siya ulit into square one. She learned to be strong. Pero her father crushed it all.
"Ang sakit. Sakit." sambit niya. Hindi niya alam kung nasa kabilang linya pa ba si Ashur o wala na.
Patuloy lang siya sa pag-iyak. Naka-higa na siya at naka-tingin sa kawalan. Hindi na niya alam kung anong oras na. At hindi niya rin alam kung patay na ba yung tawag o hindi. She just keep on staring sa moon habang umiiyak.
Maybe... I'll just go. Tumayo siya... Lumapit siya sa railings. She's looking down. Tinitingnan niya kung gaano kataas ang kina-lalagyan niya.
Maybe... walang sakit after ko na mahulog... She's not thinking straight right now. All her anxieties are eating her up— again.
BINABASA MO ANG
Deceiving You
Genel KurguAirish and Ashur, their presence screams rich and glamour. CEO of their own companies all over the world. A member of the two biggest rival Mafia. Both given a mission by their own Mafia Lords-- to gather information through the CEO and kill the Maf...
