Memory Of A Dear Place

15. Unicorn

January, 1996

Everything nice must come to an end. And so does the lovely Christmas Holiday I got to spend with Oliver. And although it started off quite horribly, it all ended quite nicely with Oliver.

We finally had sex. A couple of times actually.

In another life I would have been satisfied with the way it went. But unfortunately I live life in which Draco Malfoy fucked me twice and made me reach my orgasm by merely pointing his finger at me. I can't help but to compare Oliver to the things that Draco made me experience.

Don't get me wrong. Oliver was amazing. He was delicate and romantic. He always made sure I was okay with everything we were doing. But I had this need for him to be rough. I didn't want him to be sweet.

I don't even understand why I want that after being degraded and stepped on for my whole life. But maybe that's just the thing that fucked my mind up the most. This need of experiencing both pain and pleasure at the same time.

But the most important difference is that Draco isn't worth it and Oliver is. The fact that he treats me right and cares for me is some much more important to me than the fact that he couldn't fully satisfy me. I need to focus on that. It's what I need.

We spend our last night together in his room and I open my eyes slowly after putting my thoughts in order and I notice that Oliver already disappeared. He probably left for an early Quidditch practice before his classes start.

Luckily brought my books and uniform with me yesterday, so I don't have to make my way back to the bloody dungeons to get them. I quickly get dressed and gather all of my school stuff. I try to sneak through the Gryffindor common room, hoping to not accidentally run into someone.

I haven't seen Draco and his friends yet, since they probably arrived yesterday evening and I was with Oliver, so breakfast will be awfully fun.

As I make my way to the Great Hall the whole school is filled with students again, catching up about the Holidays and fresh gossip from Hogwarts.

I enter the Great Hall and get overwhelmed by the sound of chattering. It's been so quiet the past two weeks I almost forgot there are more people attending this school.

I look over to the Slytherin table. Draco and his friends are having breakfast together with Adrian Pucey, Marcus Flint and Theodore Nott. I quickly try to walk past them, my arms wrapped around my torso and my chin raised as I as I can. ''Mudblood!'' Pansy yells from behind me, ''We have so much to catch up on! Come sit with us!''

I ignore her and keep walking but as soon as I think I'm safe, I hear someone appear behind me. They wrap my arm and turn me around, and I find Pansy scowling at me. ''I said come sit with us, mudblood.''

She pulls me with her towards their spot and pushes me on a free spot next to Adrian, who is aggressively stuffing all kinds of food in his mouth. Marcus Flint gapes at me, revealing his crooked teeth as he smirks and shakes his head. Theodore Nott is awfully quiet as always, not paying attention to me.

My eyes shift to Draco, but he is sending me a death stare so I quickly move my eyes towards my plate as I start to grab myself some scrambled eggs and toast. It is weird to see him again and I don't know how to feel. I thought I finally got rid of him in my head, but now the thoughts keep popping up again one by one.

''So Bella,'' I see Pansy looking at me as he bites into an apple, ''Words spread fast. We heard you and Wood are officially together now?''

I slowly nod as I spread some butter on my toast, not looking up to her.