A Setback Beauty

Kabanata 50: RESOLVE

Resolve.

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         Life is full of unexpected twists and turns. I never thought that Star, who used to be my enemy when we were young, would become someone I could rely on. I never expected that I would not hesitate to show my vulnerable side to her—that even strong-willed people like me can have weaknesses, that I sometimes don't care about what others think of me, and that I would let someone see me cry.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Tita stared at me skeptically.

"Yes, Tita. I've spent most of my life in Casa de Gallego, and I don't think it's too bad if I try something new."

It has been two days since we last talked, and I'm the one who reached out this time through a video call. I want to let her know about my decision to let Star take over my position for a little while.

"Well...I kinda agree with what you said." Sumilay ang kaunting ngiti sa labi ni Tita Roma bago siya muling sumeryoso. "But are you doing this for yourself or for him?"

I smiled wanly. "I'm doing this for myself, Tita. Like you said, I need to try to move on, and I think a new environment will help me do that."

"If that's your final decision, then I'll just support you. I believe it's the best thing I can do for you right now."

"T-Thank you, Tita."

Ilang minuto pa kaming nag-usap ni Tita hanggang sa nagpaalam na siya nang dumating na si Tito Gavin sa table nila. Nasa restaurant sila para mag-late dinner.

I roamed my eyes around the bustling crowd inside the public terminal. The scene is a bit chaotic, but it didn't stop me from smiling. It feels nostalgic to be in a place like this again. When was the last time I stepped foot in a bus terminal after my middle school days?

Dumating na rin sa wakas ang provincial bus. Ilang minuto lang ay bumaba na ang konduktor. He began shouting the name of the destined place. Nagsitayuan na ang ilang pasahero na kasama kong nakaupo sa waiting area para sumakay na sa bus.

I did the same thing. Isinukbit ko na ang dala kong backpack sa balikat ko at inilabas ang ticket mula sa bulsa ng jacket ko.

With my eyes looking through the transparent window, I began yawning. The breathtaking view of the lush green rice fields and towering palm trees alongside the highway is giving me a tranquil feeling—it's making me want to drift off, and I definitely can't resist!

Mas lalo kong inilapit ang sarili ko sa tabi ng bintana saka sumandal sa upuan. It's been almost 30 minutes since the bus left the terminal and I'm starting to feel sleepy. I inserted earphones into both of my ears and listened to music from my playlist.

My eyes closed slowly. It's a good thing that the person sitting next to me is a woman. It makes me feel more comfortable.

I remember we were driving, driving in your car

Speed so fast it felt like I was drunk

I made the right choice to use public transportation because I don't want to put my life at risk by driving my car without enough sleep. Now, I can sleep whenever I feel like it.

And I-I had a feeling that I belonged

I-I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone

Naalimpungatan ako nang mag-vibrate ang cellphone ko. I rubbed my eyes while I searched for it in my cross-body bag.

My blood jumped when I saw Star's name on the screen. Of course, I should have expected her to call since I didn't come to work today. Nagbilin lang ako kay Janna sa mga dapat niyang gawin at nagpaalam na may importante akong pupuntahan ngayon.