NOBODY || JIKOOK

043

#NOBODY

The red haired male stood frozen, his face withered just like autumn and his heart clenched as life slowly runs out of his body. The words that was spilled from Jimin's lips mauled him.

What did he even expect? Jimin liking him back in just a span of couple of days? He must be kidding himself. It's not like he lives in a fairytale or a movie that with one snap of his fairy godmother's wand, Jimin will fall for him. He have been delusional.

If he thinks a person can't change so easily, he shouldn't have expected the shorter male to change feelings.

He's just Kim Taehyung, Jimin's soulmate and bestfriend and that's just how Jimin probably saw him.

Bestfriend.

How can a single word hurt so much?

It's Jungkook. It has always been Jeon Jungkook whom Jimin loves from the very start but he is Kim Taehyung and he has always been there for Jimin from the start.

How can he not notice him?

How can he not give him attention?

Was all those moments in the past couple of days where Jimin show him affection, was it all as a bestfriend? Did all those meant nothing to Jimin? Don't take it in a wrong way though. He's not blaming Jimin because the smaller guy probably meant it in another way but he had taken it in differently.

It was his fault, he assumed

Taehyung had thought that he's tiny bit closer to having Jimin. To finally call him his, that instead of being labelled as bestfriends, finally he could call him his boyfriend but maybe he was just being delusional.

Maybe Jimin intended and viewed all those interactions as a friendly affection. Maybe Taehyung just assumed everything and made a fool of himself.

Of course, Jimin will still love Jungkook very much but how and why? Jungkook hurt Jimin yet  Taehyung made sure that every single time, Jimin will feel love. All he did was take care of Jimin but how can things be so unfair?

Jungkook who had damage Jimin gets the love and attention from the smaller male but he, who tried everything to take care of Jimin, was hidden in the shadows and gone unnotice.

"What about me, Jimin-ah?" Taehyung asked as his lips quiver. Jimin smile gradually faded as they locked eyes.

Jimin open his mouth to say something but no melody was heard. He closed his eyes and lowered his head. How can he be so insensitive? He know all too well that Taehyung have feelings for him.

"Jimin-ah. What about me? I have always been here! How can you... how can you not consider me even once?! What does Jungkook even have that I don't? How can you forgive him and give him another chance just like that? So fucking easily... but why are you making it so hard for me?" Taehyung sobbed as he laid his hands on Jimin's shoulder. Jimin felt guilty and can't help the tears to stream down his face.

"Tae... I-I" Jimin whispered as he fight not to choke on his words but he  even can't help but stutter. Taehyung retrieve his hands from Jimin's shoulder and palm his face and bit his  lips.

"Jimin, please just once! Just once give me your attention and the same amount of affection and love you give to him. No, even just a little portion, tiny, and I'll be the happiest man alive. Please..." Taehyung sobbed as he fall down to his knees. Jimin looked panicked when he saw Taehyung kneeling in front of him, hands rubbing together and cheeks stained with tears.

"Taehyung please don't do this." Jimin whimpered as he tried to make Taehyung stand up.

"Jimin please... I change my mind. I don't fucking care if you don't reciprocate my feeling. I don't care at all but If you can't love me the same way as Jungkook, I would understand and I can bear it but please do this favor for me. Please don't tear yourself for Jungkook. Don't fucking destroy your walls just to accomodate him in your life. Don't torture yourself, tiny. "

"I know I'm overreacting but it fucking hurts me more than anything to see you so miserable and vulnerable. Four years of witnessing you was enough. I trust you but I don't trust you to Jungkook."

The sun is shining so brightly and the weather was so good but here they are, like heavy dark clouds pouring salty liquids down their cheeks.

"Tae... I'm really sorry f-for making you this way, for making you cry. I-I'm sorry if my actions mislead you and I-Im sorry for not being able to love you the way you do but I really do fucking love you and God knows how much important you are to me and the last thing I want is to lose you." Jimin said as he wiped his wet cheeks.

"I love you, I really do and  I know I told you had a chance because you really do. Your so utterly perfect and beautiful Kim Taehyung and I hope you know that very well but it's just, Jungkook, now matter how much he pushed me away, I still keep wanting him. I still fucking love him no matter what I do."

Jimin inched closer to Taehyung, leaving only a little gap and cupped his face as he tiptoed and kiss his forehead. "Baby, you need to move on from me, okay?" Jimin muttered as he made Taehyung look at him. Taehyung eyes widen as he shook his head.

"I want you to find someone else, someone that will give you the same love, attention and affection you give that I don't think I'll be able to give you because Tae, I'm still stuck in the maze of love with Jungkook . I love you so much my baby bear but I'm a mess and way too broken.

You can't fix me and I don't want to drag you into my problems. I don't want to give you hopes that we can work it out. I know we can but not with me still hanged up on Jungkook. You deserve so much better, baby, so please take this as my answer to your question the other day. I love you but please stop loving me more than as friends because loving me will only lead you to hurting yourself." Jimin smiled as he tried to stop himself from crying and reaking down.

Taehyung shook his head. "No. If you can't love me, I don't care. I don't care if your heart belongs to someone else, to him. I'll continue to be there for you and give you my unending affection and love. I don't want to let you go so please let me love you. Just let me love you and that would be enough."

"I can't, Tae. I don't want you to get hurt or your feelings to go to waste. I know how exhausting it is to love someone who can't love you back and that's something I don't want you to experience, especially from me."

"I won't, tiny. Making me stop from loving you is so much worse than being pushed to the edge of the cliff and falling into a pit of lava. Just let me love you and everything will be enough for me." Taehyung said as he smile and open his arms wide to embrace the smaller male and kiss the top of his head.

"I will trust you on this one and will respect your decision just don't ever make me stop loving you." Taehyung mumbled and Jimin nuzzled his head on Taehyung's chest as his tears stream down his face. Jimin nodded as his lips twitched

"Thank you so much, Tae."

Taehyung knows that he's throwing himself into the battle field without gears or weapon to protect him but he don't mind. He don't back down easily. If he don't try, he'll never know. He believes that he can still fix Jimin.

He believes that he could make Jimin forget his feeling for Jungkook or even Jungkook.

He knows he can.

He just gotta have to believe it.

"Baby, I'll love you 'till forever ends and no matter how broken you are, I'll accept and try to fix you and will love you with all my heart."

______

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