Love is Pain

It's my fantasy

I woke up to my alarm. It's 7 am in the morning.
I need to be at the prison before 10 am to pick up, Alex.

Finally, I will get to hold my wife after 4 long years.

I stretched on my bed and reached for the phone on my side table. I have Alex's picture as my wallpaper. It was a picture of her in the parrot shirt she sent me when we were still in New York. It's the only picture I have of her. Suddenly a warmth filled my whole body. This is really happening, I am going to finally see my wife and get to hold her and I can take as many pictures of her as I want. I don't know why I suddenly got so anxious.

"It's just your wife you're seeing today". I reminded my self.

I got up and went to the bathroom to take a shower. The warm water felt really good on my skin. I didn't know I was so tensed up. I began to slowly relax as I stand there in the shower and just let the warm water flow over my body.

After 20 minutes I am fully dressed. I went to the door and grabbed my keys ready to pick up my wife.

But first, I have to go get a burger and a milkshake for her from Shake Shack. I can still remember our conversation back in prison.

"Do you know what I want?.. A burger. From Shake Shack". I told Alex, while we were sitting in the cafeteria with Lorna and Nicky.

Alex, shook her head. "I legit just, like, teared up a little bit".

"Seared on the grill with tomato and melted cheese...". Alex, said dreamily.

"On a fresh, soft, potato roll". I added.

"With a milkshake". Alex added.

"Nah, don't get greedy". I shot back.

"It's my fantasy. And I can have a milkshake with a side of Cate Blanchett". Alex commented.

"My veins hurt right now and you're thinking about sex?". I asked incredulously.

"No dummy".
"I want someone to massage my head and she looks like she'd have really cool fingers". Alex, said while waving her fingers.

I am smiling alone in my car while reminiscing it.

I arrived at the prison an hour early.

I parked my car right across the steel gate. Slowly, other people started coming in. Like me, they are also anxiously waiting for thier loved ones who will be coming out today.

It's 10 o'clock. I feel like I'm hyperventilating. Any minute my wife will be walking out that door.

11:30 and I'm starting to get anxious. What could be the hold up?

A lot of scenarios are going through my head now. Maybe something bad happened inside. Maybe an accident. An asshole CO gave Alex, added time.

I'm hyperventilating again. I rest my head on the steering wheel and about to cry.
Just then I heard the steel gate open and I look up and saw my beautiful wife coming out the door.

I immediately open my car door and ran towards, Alex. I open my arms to embrace her. I slammed my body to her so hard she almost lost her balance.