Oh, this is gonna be a gas!

Return to Sender

I have to go find out, Jo leaves to go investigate Moms death

Lizzie rolled over in the middle of the night. Her eyes slowly opened and she looked over at her wife quickly becoming alert. While expecting to see Jo's peaceful face she was met by Jo's discomfort. Jo's eyebrows were furrowed, her face scrunched up as she whimpered and squirmed. Lizzie laid there for a few seconds watching Jo to see if she would settle on her own. She did not. Lizzie reached out trying to gently wake her wife. When it didn't work she sat up rubbing her a little harder. "Come on baby! Wake up, baby!"

Jo continued to toss and turn before finally sitting up quickly. "LIZZIE!"

Lizzie quickly brought Jo to her "Shh. Shh, I'm here."

"Lizzie, it was so bad." She sobbed into Lizzies chest. "Oh god Lizzie, it's so bad." Lizzie stroked Jo's hair

"Oh, baby." Lizzie took Jo's face into her hand brushing her tears away "Shh. Just breathe"

"Lizzie." Jo pleaded, "Lizzie."

"What is it, baby? I am right here."

"I think my Mama killed herself."

After the initial shock wore off Lizzie said "What makes you think that baby?"

"I don't know. I just feel it."

Lizzie was trying to comprehend what Jo was saying "What do you want to do about it?"

Jo snuggled into Lizzie "I-I don't know."

Lizzie kissed the top of Jo's head "That's okay."

The two didn't get very much sleep that night both unable to close their eyes. Lizzie was the first one to leave the bed. Around an hour later Jo slowly walked downstairs and saw Lizzie standing at the counter with a coffee mug in her hands.

Lizzie looked up "Good morning love."

Jo smiled sadly. "Hey."

"Do you want to talk about last night?"

Jo slowly sat on the bar stool placing her head in her hands rubbing her face "Yeah." She strained. Lizzie came around the counter rubbing her back sitting down. "I've been having these nightmares and each time she visits me-"

"Your mother?"

"Yes and she says these things like 'my decisions won't affect you as a mother' and 'I'm sorry with stuff like 'I wish I could have stayed.'"

Lizzie tilted her head "I believe you baby but are you sure it's not just stress?"

"Lizzie I can't explain it I just I-I have never felt something so deep inside."

Lizzie rubbed Jos back harder

"Okay. Okay. Okay. What do you want to do?"

"I need to go home... to Georgia."

Lizzie nodded "Well I have work-"

"Alone Lizzie."

"Oh," Lizzie said sadly

Jo turned to her taking her wife's face into her hands "I want you there so bad-"

"Obviously not since you are asking me not to come."

"Lizzie." Jo said gently "I love you so much. I just. This is something I need to do alone."

"But you don't have to do this alone."