The Final Project

Chapter 35

tw: mentions of abuse (only read if you're comfortable)

Ivy

Aaron drives me to my house, and I know he's concerned. I know he knows that something is wrong.

"Ivy..."

"I don't wanna talk right now."

"I can wait." He turns into a random parking lot and we sit there in silence. My eyes sting, trying to hold back tears. He can't see me this way.

"All you do is walk around with your perfect face, and perfect hair, and perfect grades, and perfect boyfriend. Who are you to say no one's perfect?" Her words keep ringing in my ears, no matter how hard I try to stop them.

"Take me home," I say, wanting to shrivel up in a ball and cry myself to sleep. Aaron just sits there, waiting for me to tell him what's wrong.

"I said take me home!"

"Why?"

"Because...it's getting late, and my mom'll be worried." I lie a stupid lie that he catches right away.

"It's seven-o-clock." Silence. We sit in silence again, before he breaks it.

"You can tell me anything. You know that?" He brings my face towards his and rubs my cheeks with the pads of his thumbs, looking into my eyes at the same time.

I look away, not being able to maintain eye contact without starting to cry. "Hey, look at me." His eyes roam around my face, trying to study how I'm feeling. As soon as his brows furrow in worry, the tears roll down my cheeks. His arms wrap around me as I cry into his shoulder.

"Sorry, I just-I need a minute." He pulls me over the car's console and onto his lap in the driver's seat.

"You can tell me anything," he reiterates. I nod at him. Anything. If I do tell Aaron why I'm crying, he'll know a part of me that I've never shared with the world, a part of me I hide away at all costs.

I myself haven't accepted that part, so I don't expect him to accept it either. I need to go into this knowing that he won't treat me the same way after.

It'll hurt, of course, but I'll understand. I'm a fraud, afterall. He signed up for the perfect version of Ivy, not the scared broken girl I actually am. It's not fair for him to be dealing with all my problems, anyway.

"When I was younger," I start, taking a pause to calm myself down. "When I was younger, my dad wanted me to be the ideal daughter. He wanted me to be perfect, I guess." Aaron listens to me intently, reassuring me by rubbing my back. "I needed to get good grades, and listen to exactly what he told me to do. He would say, 'I need to keep you in check,' so he would make sure I was in check when I did something wrong...."

"How did he keep you in check?" I feel sweat forming on the back of my neck, and my heart races rapidly.

"He would hurt me..." I look at Aaron for any signs of disgust, if he wants me to leave right now, or wants to say I'm being dramatic, but he doesn't. He just looks sad.

"What do you mean, hurt you, Ivy?"

"He would hit me, and I don't know, maybe I'm being dramatic. It wasn't that bad, but I just-"

"Stop." I knew this was coming. He's going to say that he doesn't want me anymore. "How did he hit you, and how frequently?" he says instead.

"It wasn't that bad. Sometimes just a slap or a punch..."

"The other times?"

"A belt." I say it in a whisper. Horrid memories come to my mind of the sound of the belt hitting my body, the sting when it repeatedly hit the same spot.

Aaron stares at me as his breathing picks up, tears starting to pour down my face again. He pulls me in a tight hug, tighter than he ever has before, and I cry. I cry until I have no tears left in me to cry.

"I'm gonna hurt him just as badly as he hurt you." His words are like a threat, and it's a threat I'm afraid of.

As much as my dad has wronged me, he's still my dad, and a part of me feels bad for him. He must have had a miserable life for him to turn out the way he did.

"No, Aaron." I pull away from the hug and find him zoned out, brows furrowed in anger. I move his face towards mine, and make him look at me. "If you do that, it'll only hurt me."

"He deserves-"

"It's not your place to say what he does and doesn't deserve." I hug him again, craving his warmth and comfort more than anything. Reluctantly, he wraps his arms around me, and we sit there, in the parking lot, me having just told someone the thing I've hid all my life.

It feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, but I'm still afraid of what Aaron thinks. I'm afraid he'll treat me differently. As if reading my mind he says, "This changes nothing, Ivy. I'm proud of you for opening to me, and continuing to be the way you are after everything you've been through."

And then we kiss.