My Destination, My Bondita

178 - He Was The Corpse, and She Was Life

Trilochan, Vikram and Batuk placed an unconscious Anirudh down on the bed. He looked lifeless, his features sullen. There wasn't even a ray of hope on his face. 

"I am not surprised..." Trilochan said, tears in his eyes, as the three of them stood to the side of the room, watching him and making sure he wouldn't puke and choke on his own vomit. 

"I never saw Dada drink this... only Baba drinks this!" Batuk said, tears in his eyes too. 

Vikram looked at the bottles of alcohol. He had never seen anyone drink this!

"Anirudh's heartbeat is Bondita. It's not just said without reason," Kaka murmured. "He's not Anirudh, without her." 

"Why is that Bondita's Kakasasurji?" Vikram asked. 

Kaka turned to look at Bikram and said, "Bikram, how do I explain it to you? The relationship that these two share."

"Yes, I know! I have seen how much he loves her!" Vikram agreed, "But why are you saying he's not Anirudh without her? Doesn't he have his own identity? Doesn't he have a life outside of her? And Bondita too? Bondita is so strong, but her Pati Babu is a wreck! Why?"

Kaka had tears in his eyes and he explained, "Without Shakti, Shiva is called Shava, which means corpse. The ee bija, or sound, comes from Shakti. It is the sound of life. When this fuses with Shava, only then does he become Sheeva... or Shiva." 

 Vikram looked at Kaka with amazement. 

"One name of Shiva is Anirudh," Trilochan said, tears spilling down his cheeks, "So you tell me... won't he too be a corpse without his Shakti? Shakti is life... but Shiva needs her to live. Otherwise he is no less than dead." 

Batuk was surely listening, but Vikram was the one who was more in awe by everything that Kaka was saying. 

"If she is so powerful, that she gives even Shiva life then why aren't women worshipped more?" Vikram wondered out loud, but Kaka ignored his question. 

As far as Vikram had seen in his life, women were treated poorly, yet they worshipped many Goddesses in this country! Why was that? It didn't make sense! 

Vikram continued though, and he innocently asked, "And does that mean Bondita doesn't need her Pati Babu?" 

Batuk's eyes widened at such an idea that his Boudi wouldn't need his Dada! 

"No Bikram, how can Shakti live without Shiva? If Shakti is life, then Shiva is the canvas that life manifests on. Without the canvas, can there be a picture?" Trilochan asked. "Of course Bahu needs Anirudh. Of course Shakti too needs Shiva. They need each other. Only together can they do what they're here to do. Only together can they survive. This is their bond. This is their relationship." 

Vikram glanced at Anirudh's sleeping, lifeless figure sympathetically. How would Bondita's Pati Babu get through life without Bondita? He wished he could help him. 

-- 

When Anirudh woke up, only Batuk was beside him. Vikram had to go back home, and Kaka was working on other errands.  

"Dada," Batuk said, sounding concerned. 

Anirudh sat up on his bed and mumbled, "Batuk go from here." 

His head was aching, but not more than his heart. 

He had come back and drank himself into unconsciousness last night. He felt like a coward. He felt terrible for running away like that, for abandoning his Bondita. But what else could he do?