Upstead comfort fics

Coming Clean

(I got a request for Hailey having another panic attack when Jay gets home in 9.04, so here it is!)
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Jay stepped into he and Hailey's new apartment and took in the silence. He hoped Hailey was finally asleep; his girl had hardly slept in a week and it was impacting her mental and physical health.

He saw the empty whiskey bottle on the counter, one he knew was over half full the night before, and sighed. She'd had a lot when she got home from work, possibly to try and get herself to sleep. That worried Jay more than he already was, Hailey hadn't been eating much and that much alcohol on an empty stomach wasn't good for anyone.

Jay threw the bottle away and took a deep breath. He was still fuming from the conversation with Voight and had been hoping Hailey would be awake when he got home so he could talk to her and hear her side of things. He was furious, but not at Hailey. He was hurt that she hadn't come to him, but he wasn't mad at her. Just at Voight and the situation.

He made his way to their room and stood in the doorway, watching for a moment as Hailey slept. Her face was littered with bruises and scratches, and he could tell she was tense, but she was asleep.

Hailey wasn't sure what alerted her, but she woke with a gasp and her eyes flew open. They landed on Jay, watching her from the doorway, and she propped herself up on her elbows. Jay continued to watch her, and her heart all but stopped. He was mad, and her breathing hitched as panic seized her mind.

Jay saw the look on her face and walked towards Hailey, but the blonde went into fight or flight and managed to jump out of bed and run out of the room before Jay could stop her. He sighed again and turned towards the door, following his fiancée.

Hailey had run to the balcony and curled herself in a ball in the corner as she tried to breathe. Jay had to know, and she was absolutely terrified he was going to yell at her and/or leave her. She didn't want him to leave, she needed him. Hailey was so caught up in her panic that she didn't hear the door open or Jay's footsteps as he walked towards her and sat down. He touched her arm and she jumped.

"It's just me, Hailey. It's okay. Here, hold my hand and put your head between your knees. You're having another panic attack, baby. Focus on feeling my hand and breathing. I'm here," Jay felt her shaking, clammy hands grab his like a lifeline, and he used his other hand to rub her back.

She was struggling more than she had during her attack in the locker room, and it scared her. She couldn't breathe.

"H-he-help," she managed, hoping Jay could hear her.

Jay did hear it and pulled Hailey into his lap so she could feel his breathing. "Hailey, feel my breathing. Follow me, I'm right here. You're safe and everything is going to be okay. Just breathe," he soothed, stroking her hair as he took slow, deep breaths.

Hailey did her best to follow Jay's breathing and was able to breathe after about ten minutes. Then the exhaustion set in and she couldn't support herself at all. Jay felt her body sag against him and held her tighter as she cried silently.

"I've got you, baby. It's okay," he kissed her head and hoped she would respond, but she stayed quiet, hands clutching his shirt.

When she started shivering, Jay decided to try and get her inside. He moved her off his lap and went to stand, causing Hailey to cry out. She was scared he was leaving, and she wasn't feeling very good.

"Shhh, it's okay. Come on, Hails," Jay stood her up and hugged her. Hailey pushed away and turned around, confusing Jay until she threw up the alcohol she'd consumed.

"Okay, that's okay. I'm here," he held her hair and kept a hand on her back until she finished.

"Sorry," she cried.