Those Ocean Eyes and That Charming Smile

141

A few days passed and I still can't get used to waking up and greet Bucky's sleeping body, just hoping that he can hear me and praying that he will wake up soon. He was moved into a more private room when more missions passed for SHIELD and injured patients came in so Bucky had to be moved which is not a big deal, I actually like it more. The privacy that is. Steve and I still sleep on the futon next to Bucky's bed and I have made a complete mess out of the scrapbook materials after having Steve go to the store and print off different pictures off of my phone day after day.

He loved going through our memories though.

And missed seeing Bucky's smile from the forties.

Different clippings of many colors and designs litter the floor from last night's session of gluing down every memory I could think of and writing the description to the side, trying to match it to Bucky's but he is still better at it and this is a competition that I don't want to win even if it existed. Now, I sleep on the futon with Steve slowly waking up when I hear small deep grunts next to me that makes me roll over and grimace at my right arm moving after being stiff and hanging off the edge of the bed for God knows how long. My foot lifts and slightly kicks Steve in an attempt to get him to shut up and stop grunting in his sleep but, he never does.

"Steve, shut the fuck up." I mutter after lightly kicking him again. "Fucking loud ass." I sigh and pull my blanket back up to my chin

"Mmm." Steve groans but stops

I lay on my left side with my knees tucked up to my chest just to take pressure off of my stitches and my arm wrapped around my body in a self soothing thing Steve told me about when he noticed me doing it one night. There are more but softer grunts that start up again and I roll my eyes under my eyelids until I jerk and gasp while sitting up when something crashes to the ground and clatters against the cold tile behind me. There is a muttered curse word as I look down at Steve to see that he hasn't moved an inch and I look over my shoulder to see Bucky looking at me with an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, babydoll." Bucky whispers with a small, guilty smile

"It's fine, Bucky." I shake my head and lay back down to close my eyes only for them to snap them back open and I gasp while getting up from the bed. "Bucky!" I exclaim

"Hi, precious." He smiles when he sees me shuffling to get out from under my blanket that fights with me as I kick and rip it off but I eventually move my feet to the soaked floor after I look down and see a spilled plastic cup of water

"Oh, James." I ignore everything in this world when moving my hands to Bucky's waist and right hand that comes up to the side of my face to wipe the tears from my cheeks as my face scrunches in a cry that shakes my shoulders and bends me down a little

"It's okay, Y/n." He moves his left hand to my hand that's on his waist. "I'm alright, baby."

I shake my head while sucking in a choppy breath as Bucky guides me into his bed, being careful not to hurt himself when my knees press into the thin mattress and I lay on my left side while making sure not to hit his still stitched skin when I lay against his side and wrap an arm around his waist. He patiently holds me and rubs his right hand up and down my side that makes my cut ache unknowingly but his touch is something I missed so I don't mind and let him hug me, squeeze me, and kiss the top of my head that he holds to his shoulder with his left hand.

"I lost you." I softly cry. "I lost the most important person to me."

"I'm here." Bucky barely speaks. "I'm right here with you, my babydoll."

"You died." I look up at his frown with one of my own. "I did everything  I could and you still didn't make it." I softly cry when I repeat the words I've been telling myself in my head for day