Those Ocean Eyes and That Charming Smile

172

It's finally July and that means that I'm getting better up in my head and it also means that my abs are getting softer, muscles are getting stronger, and my legs have never been closed for more than eight hours with Bucky really using the 'beneficial' part of the friendship deal and is always walking around like an inescapable sex swing that just throws you for in for a whirlwind of emotions and feelings that leaves you with ratty hair, shaking legs, and a sex drunken smile that puts you to sleep when he leaves for the night after taking extreme care of you, only to wake you up a few hours later with morning sex in the craziest positions and balanced on the weirdest surfaces that he manages to find and makes it work.

But, I love it.

Almost embarrassingly obsessed with it.

Since I don't have ab workouts anymore, I can spend all of my time building strength in my thighs and ass which I have been doing to the point I had to go shopping with Natasha to buy new leggings and shorts that Bucky can't seem to take his eyes off of when we walk into the training room. It makes me laugh now while I pick out clothes in my closet to think back and just remember his eyes going up and down, up and down, up and down when Steve would coach me through some weighted pull ups and squats- who apparently didn't see his best friend's look.

"Hmm." I chuckle to myself and pick out a simple outfit of a cropped, light yellow tank top that has a small blue embroidered butterfly on the chest paired with a high waisted, white skirt that has a short but wide slit on the right side to open up the tight ends a little

Shoes are not needed since I'm not leaving the house so I quickly settle for a pair of white socks that slip on easily and glide across the hallway floor to get to the elevator. I've been in a better mood because of how many full pages I have in my journal that are all signifying the memories slowly but willingly coming back to me and all it takes sometimes is a few key words instead of very long explanations that takes fifteen minutes to speak when it is in heavy detail. Of course, however, I have had my fair share of bad days but the good certainly weighs out the bad like Mother Mary said and I am feeling like Rapunzel with my long hair that was freshly cut by Thor- might I add, and is flowing beautifully behind me.

That's a lot coming from me if I take the time and words to compliment myself.

"Someone looks very cheery this afternoon." Clint comments in a laugh as he was waiting for the elevator doors to open, only to see me

"Another full page, Clint." I nod and step out to offer the empty lift to him

"Nice job, kiddo." He lifts a hand and ruffles my hair which drops my smile. "I'm so very proud of you!" He calls in a fit of laughter as the door close after seeing my playful scowl

"Mhm." I hum and run my fingers through my hair before turning to grab a drink from the refrigerator

To my surprise, Bucky is sitting alone at the island when I do turn around and look around the place but, that's not the surprising part. He likes to be alone and actually prefers it more than having company that is obviously excluding me and I don't even mean that as an ego inflator, it's just true. But, the surprising part is seeing his back slouched and his head down on his folded arms, looking absolutely miserable to be here and it makes me frown but the bewilderment of wondering what he's thinking takes over my saddened look as I open the fridge door where I know he hears me.

He knows the difference in everyone's steps with Thor's being the heaviest in another obvious and mine being the lightest in the last obvious. He also has told me he knows my breathing patterns and how my heart beats faster when I see him which I only half believe again, thanking Steve for telling that valuable information that both soldiers now tease me on in two very separate scenarios and occasions. Bucky also mentioned that I hum a little under my breath when I am super concentrated on something or when I waltz through the house while thinking about space itself or nothing at all but this time, my vocal cords are still as I wait for Bucky to lift his head off the table.