Random au

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Lucifer: You're a good boy. Only listen to papa, ok?

Jamey: Ok!

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Chris: Papa is stupid and dumb. Listen to Dada, ok?

Jamey: Ok!

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Angelo: Listen to neither!! Momma's the only correct person in this house. Ok?

Jamey: Ok!

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Lucifer: You told him I was dumb??

Chris: and stupid.

Lucifer: *corners him against the wall* oh you are so gonna get it when I fuck you into the mattress!!

Angelo: *covers Jamey's ears* Lucy please!

Jamey: *blinks owlishly at them*

Angelo: *uncovers them*

Lucifer: Creepy. Don't do that.

Jamey: *frowns and nods* Ok papa! I won't do it no more.

Angelo: You can still be yourself ok?

Chris: *shoves Lucifer away* Don't listen to Lucy. You can do what you want as long as it doesn't harm yourself or others.

Jamey: I-

Angelo: no it should be, there are certain limits on what you can do-

Lucifer: No it isn't! It's listen to your parents or they'll discipline you. Spanking and stuff like that.

Chris: That's terrible!

Angelo: We are not hitting our children.

Lucifer: What?? They used to do that shit all the time!

Angelo: *looks at Jamey* Don't listen to that.

Jamey: *holding his head* Hmmph!

Angelo: What's wrong?

Jamey: *grunts and looks away from them*

Chris: *looks over* What's wrong Jamey?

Jamey: *puffs out his cheek*

Lucifer: What are you doing?

Jamey: Too complicated! *runs away*

Angelo: ah-

Chris: ah crap-

Lucifer: Too complicated??

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Imagine trying to balance three dads. Who do you listen too???

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