Dawn | Bucky Barnes ✔️

13. Speak now

W I D O W   S E V E N T E E N

I didn't know where I was going when I left the stark tower, my legs just walked on there own as I simply just watch the scenery go by. I didn't even realise that I stopped outside an guidance counsellor building fourteen blocks away from the tower.

I am not going to this just because Loki and the avengers told me to. I'm going to this shit hole for me. No one else. I have to do this even if it means I have to open up. If I don't start now then when?

My eyes glance up at the building, there sign flickering big and bright as if they want us to get in faster or leave so we don't stand out here to long. My legs move again as I subconsciously open the door handle hearing a ding from the bell above me.

Here goes nothing.

I walk through the double doors with my hands behind my back as I fiddle with the wrist band on my left hand. I snap it back as it hits my skin, I get used to the pain that I don't even flinch anymore.

The bell rings from above me signalling my arrival. I see a male sitting at the front desk with circled glasses perched on his face as he types away on the computer. His eyes would dart to mine before typing away again.

It was not before I had arrived at his desk that he stops what he is doing, he smiles up at me from his seat. "Hello Zahra Jenkins right?" He questioned nicely. I nodded my head, my eyes glancing around the waiting area with nerves bubbling inside of me.

"Ms Raynor will come to get you shortly, if you could just sign this sheet and sit down other there" He smiles as he placed a sign in sheet on the desk.

I quickly jot down my name even if I do remember it, I don't remember who that girl was.
I wish that I could go back to that little girl but I can't.

I go over to sit in the annoyingly comfortable, leather seat of the waiting room near Ms Raynor's office. My hands begin to sweat as I rub them down my black jeans, the fabric scrapping against me as I nip over the edges. My eyes dart everywhere, my body beginning to go on over drive.

The soft music in the background doesn't help me from panicking in to myself. After years of being over actively sensitive, I have learnt to control my emotions in front of others but the dart of my eyes always gives it away.

It didn't long until I hear a woman's voice talk with the front desk, my eyes flying towards her as she turns her head in my direction. "Zahra Jenkins?" She asks, she is exactly what I expected of what a counsellor should look like. She looks to be in her mid forties but I can't judge on appearances. She's dressed in a professional suit, with her hair up in a brown pony tail and her eyes seem so light and soft.

"Just Seventeen" I clarified when I stand up from the chair, I don't know why I said it but I guess it's because I'm used to hearing it and it's drilled into my brain.

"Come on in" she smiles as I follow into her office before she leans into me. "Just seventeen"

"Funny" I half amused.

"I do try" She counters, wandering over to her black leathered sofa chair. "Very peculiar name"

"Your last name definitely fits your job description, so yes it's peculiar"

"Has humour, I like it" She smiles as she motions me to sit across from her with this green and blue background of a field almost.

I follow her command even if it was hardly one anyways. I drag my hands across my skinny black jeans, suddenly feeling jittery and a little rattled. My eyes dart everywhere but at her while I try to absorb everything around me.