twisted wonderland one-shots (requests CLOSED! for now)

lilia x gn!reader

synopsis: pure angst. SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER SEVEN AHEAD!! lilia tells you that he's dying and you're not having a good time processing it

"Hello, dear," says Lilia, sitting down on his bed. You give him a smile and he grins back, even though it's much wearier than normal.

"Hey. What's up? You said you wanted to talk," you say, waving your phone which had his text requesting that you meet in his room displayed on the screen.

"Yes, I'm afraid this isn't something that can be postponed," he says, letting you take his hand in yours. "Could you let me get it all out before you say anything? Just this once, love," he asks, and you nod immediately. Lilia's grin slips off of his face and something crosses over his eyes, shadowing them and giving him a glimpse into the exhausted state he's in. You're getting worried but you stay silent, squeezing his hand in support.

"Well, I suppose there's no use in delaying it. I'm dying, my dear. My magic has begun to run out as well—I can barely get from place to place anymore. I'm afraid I don't have all that much time left. I'm not what I once was, and I feel that you deserve to know what you'll be getting yourself into, in case you decide to leave."

Lilia cautions a glance at you, heart sinking as he takes in the stony mask your face is set in. What did he expect? It's not like this is something that someone can take lightly—this is your boyfriend  that's dying.

A full minute passes before you say anything, voice shaky. "Do you know how much time you have left?" you ask, trying your damn best not to cry on the spot.

"I don't know. It could be a few months or it could be a few years—fae time works differently, but either way it's not much," he says quietly, watching you process this. When you stay silent, he continues, pulling his hand away from you.

"The process will be slow. I'm already losing my magic and soon enough, there will be nothing left for me to hold onto. I'll be too weak to do much on my own. I don't want that to be the last memory of me you have. Should you decide to leave, I won't blame you," he says, watching you page at him with wide eyes.

"W-well, I'm not leaving! You're my boyfriend, Lilia!" you exclaim, outraged that he'd even bring it up. "I'm gonna stay with you!"

Lilia wants to be touched by your words, but there's something keeping him from taking them all in. "I'm going to waste away. It won't be a pretty sight—surely that's not what you want, is it?"

"I don't want you to be alone, though! I want to be there with you!"

"Love," says Lilia, not understanding why  you'd want to stay with him through this painful process, "it won't be the same as before. Everything from now on will just go downhill—my time is up," he says, and then instantly regrets it when you start to cry.

"I don't care! I just want to stay with you!" you sob, grabbing his hand again. "I'm not leaving!"

"You're just going to hurt yourself," says Lilia, almost annoyed. Why didn't you understand? He's never going to be the same strong man again, yet you still  want to stay? "I think it would be best if things ended. I can't put you through something like this."

You cling to Lilia harder, shaking your head. "No! You can't make me leave!"

"Who not?!" shouts Lilia, tired of watching you break down for his sake. "There will be nothing  for you if you stay!"

"So what?!" you shout back, face streaked with tears. "So fucking what?! I'm not doing this because I'm looking for a prize!"

"Then why do you insist on staying?! You will watch me die!  Is that what you want? Do you want to watch me wither away until I'm a mere husk of the man you knew? You will  never  get me back," says Lilia, feeling something prick at the corner of his eyes—tears.

"Yes! I want to stay!" you exclaim, exasperated. "I love you, don't you get it?! I can't leave you along when you're going through something like this! I love you," you say again, hiccuping in between your words.

"You say that, but will you mean it when I'm too weak to even move?" asks Lilia, feeling his tears well up.

"I love you now and I'll love you later," you say, taking his other hand in yours. "Just because you won't be the same won't mean that I'm going to stop loving you. I love every part of you—even the ones that you don't," you say, your voice quieting down.

You're caught off-guard as Lilia swoops forward and closes your arms around you, burying his face in your shoulder. Immediately, you wrap your arms around his shaking body, cupping the back of his head while his tears wet your shirt.

You stay like that for a long while. You card your fingers through Lilia's bi-colored hair, rocking slightly as you let him settle in your lap.

It's not often that Lilia cries. In fact, you don't think he's ever let you see him like this—he's almost completely silence, but the way his shoulders heave with each breath give away how emotionally wrecked he's become.

Did he really think that you'd leave him? Your heart clenches; people must have left him before this. Dating a fae has it's ups and downs—and this was a big  down. Whether they left because he'd live too long or because his life was slowly coming to an end, he'd clearly been expecting you to do the same.

"Let's lay down for a bit," you say, pulling Lilia down with you and letting him situate himself with his head on your chest.

Lilia's face is red and blotchy. His cheeks are wet and his breathing still hasn't evened out, and when you shift a bit he makes a noise, high in his throat, and clung harder to you, closing his eyes again.

You stroke his hair, keeping an arm wrapped around your boyfriend while you think about what will happen to him.

You'd noticed him become a little slower, and he didn't seem to have as much energy as before, even after conducting simple spells. You'd known that he was old, even for a fae, but...you hadn't realized the weight that he'd been carrying this whole time. Watching him rest on top of you, shuddering and melting in your arms, you can really see how exhausted he is.

You squeeze him a little harder, hearing him let out a soft squeak as you do. You don't want to cry again, but...you bury your face in Lilia's hair, letting out shuddering little breaths as you try to comfort your boyfriend.

You want—no, you need  to be strong for Lilia. He's going through something you can't entirely understand and you need to stay calm for him. You know he's going to need a lot of help going through this, and you're more than willing to help him through it—but right now, you just want to hold him and not think about what's going on with him.

You fall asleep with Lilia resting on your chest, the two of you intertwined with each other. You're going to help him. There's not a doubt in your mind that you're going to stay.