Chapter 38

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Waking up with his arm draped over my waist, his head resting in the crook of my neck it felt right

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Waking up with his arm draped over my waist, his head resting in the crook of my neck it felt right. Almost too right.

Mason was right, I needed to tell him or leave him. I had to find the right time to tell him and exactly how to tell him.

I tried to move out from under his hold, but since he was 6'4 and I was 5'3 it was a little difficult. Without disrupting his sleeping self, I managed to slip out from under his bicep. I could never get over how comfortable his bed was. I sat on the edge of the bed stretching my back and arms.

I slid off his bed looking back to make sure he was still sleeping. I walked over to his door, carefully opening it trying desperately to not make any noise.

I made it into the hallway and started for the stairs. What I didn't plan on was seeing Mae preparing Christmas brunch at six thirty in the morning. I purposely woke up early so I could leave without having anyone shame me.

"Oh honey I didn't think you stayed the night," I had my hand on the door handle ready to leave. I turned around facing the women whose son I had just spent the night with.

"Oh it was late and Ryan didn't want to drive so he thought I could stay," it had just hit me that I was still in his sweatshirt along with his boxers. I tried discreetly crossing my legs to hide the boxers, but it didn't work.

"Honey I like you a lot and I think you're very good for my son, but I will not have any of that goofing around under my roof," every time I would get yelled at or scolded by someone of authority, my face suddenly starts to become red and I start to swear and stutter.

"Oh, it um, nothing happened, I wouldn't-no," I couldn't spit out any of what I was trying to say. "You promise that nothing happened," she looked at me with such concern.

"I absolutely am sure, he just didn't want me to sleep in my dress so he came me some of his clothes," I slowly started to uncross my legs as the tension started to ease.

"Well I still love you and just want you to know none of that will be tolerated under my roof," I nodded my head vigorously. "Yes I understand," the only thing that was left in this conversation was the uncomfortable silence.

"I should get going, I really appreciate you letting me join you yesterday, um just tell Ryan I had to get home," I couldn't stay there anymore. Without saying goodbye, I walked out of the large double doors as fast as I could.

I was just aware that I would be walking home looking like I had just found clothes out of the donation bin at church.

Well time to start my lonely, thought consuming walk home.

***

I was almost home. I kept walking with my bare feet against the gravel roads. Growing up in Jackson, you learn to tolerate walking on the gravel. I can't tell you how many times I've been on walks with my brother trying to catch fireflies with our bare feet walking against the gravel roads.

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