Friction || Luke Hemmings

Alli- 04

"What happened to your wrist, honey?" My mothers eyes were glued to my arm as I tried to pick up my fork without flinching, obviously failing as she noticed my grimace.

"Nothing."

"Allison." She warned, setting down her fork forcefully, the metal clanking the table loudly.

"I fell. It's fine though."

"It's really swollen, have you taken anything?"

No. "Yes."

"Have you iced it?"

No. "Yes."

"Maybe we should take you to the doctor. It's looking pretty bruised."

"It's fine mum."

"Are you sure sweetie?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine." She nodded her head once, not at all convinced. Although she never questioned it again.

The rest of dinner was spent in silence, my wrist hurting like hell, although I would never admit it. My thigh was burning a little, but that pain I was used to. That pain I welcomed.

I don't really know when it started, all I knew is that I couldn't stop. Anytime I felt the need to cry, I gave myself a reason to. I refused to cry because of him, I couldn't give him the satisfaction when all he had done was make fun of me. So instead of crying because of what he had said, I brought out a blade and gave myself a reason to cry. It hurt like hell, but I got used to it after awhile.

I was not, however, expecting him to walk in on me while I was doing it. It had been a good half hour before he came barging into my room, I had thought he was long gone. But I was so wrong. The worst part wasn't even that he walked in though. It's not like he could really use it against me, it would just add to things I would hear in school. I could practically hear them now.

She hurts herself because she knows he'll never love her.

She does it to make him feel bad.

She's just a freak, who cares?

But the worst part was that it actually seemed like he cared. For a brief five minutes or so, it was the Luke that I had fallen in love with. The Luke that I knew. The Luke who was my best friend. And he almost had me fooled.

He didn't care. I may have caught him off guard, but he most definitely didn't care. It's probably what he wanted. Maybe he hated me so much he wanted me dead. It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest.

I just had absolutely no idea what I could have possibly done to make him hate me. All I remember is him suddenly pushing me away, shutting me out. It had started out slowly, just hanging out less and less, but then I heard people talking about me. Then I heard him talk about me.

I remember the first time I heard him say something about me, my heart had immediately broke, which was no surprise seeing as I thought I was in love with him. The words had felt like a searing iron straight to my heart- 'she's a loser, I mean just look at her'. It only escalated from there.

"You don't have to do the dishes, just go ice your wrist." I nodded at my mother, accepting the bag of ice she handed me before retreating to my room.

I locked the door behind me, not wanting her to come in and bother me. It was already after nine, and although I knew I wouldn't sleep I wasn't planning on leaving my room. Maybe I'll even pretend to be sick tomorrow so I can avoid hearing what everyone is gonna say about me. I try to pretend like it doesn't hurt, hearing what they say, but it does.