The Last Chicane

Rude Awakening

My gaze locked with Alex's as my mind started racing, trying to figure out what the hell was happening and what alternate universe I was currently in.

Alex looked at me raising her chin, smiling at me like she had just won the lottery. She quickly turned to look down the hallway as I heard Charles' voice get closer.

I was too shocked to even hear what he was saying, but as soon as he rounded the doorway, his eyes locked onto mine.

I just looked back and forth between the two of them, speechless. Embarrassment immediately crept in as I thought about how she saw me now. Suitcase in hand, standing at his doorway, looking pathetic.

You were such a fucking idiot Blake. How could you believe everything that has happened over the past couple of months was real?

"I'll see you at the next race, Charles." Alex's words brought me out of my trance.

He smiled tightly at her and she walked passed me and down the hallway. I could feel her eyes staring at me as she left.

She had just made it out of our view, before Charles started towards me.

"Blake, just let me explain." He took a step forward, I took a step back.

I shook my head at him, closing my eyes.

Rejection stung, always did.

I could feel old wounds opening back up. Wounds from my parents rejecting me time and time again. Every time they chose my brother over me. When they kicked me out. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the tears away.

I will not be vulnerable in front of him or anyone else. Not now, never again.

"Please Blake. You don't understand, please just give me a minute to explain." He tried stepping towards me again, but I stepped away again and held my hand out, stopping him from trying to come any closer.

This is what I get for trusting people again.

I grabbed the handle of my suitcase, turned around, and walked away. Charles didn't try to come after me, and didn't try to say anything to me again either.

I quickly pulled my phone out and called Max.

"I need you to turn around and come get me. Now." I said, my voice lethally calm.

He knew something was wrong because all he said was, "I'll be there in two minutes."

________________________

I was curled up on Max's couch, in the same position as when I had first gotten here- which I think was 3 hours ago.

Max had not pushed me talk yet, but he did say he was here for me whenever I was ready to talk about what happened. Kelly was gone to something for work, and P was with her dad. So it was just us here.

For the past 3 hours I have tried to make sense of what just happened. I felt numb and like I was burning alive all at the same time.

Max brought me some tea, forcing me to sit up so he could come and sit next to me.

"Okay. It's been 3 hours and you literally haven't moved. Please talk to me." He wrapped an arm around me as I leaned my head to rest on his shoulder.

I finally mustered up the courage to speak.

"I'm an idiot." I stated.

He shook his head. "No. You are anything but an idiot."

I was quiet for a couple of seconds before speaking again.

"Alex was at his apartment."

He froze before slowly turning his head towards me. It was a long moment before he spoke. "What?"

I told him everything that I could remember that had happened. I felt a tear fall, and I didn't even try to hide it.

I felt another one fall. Then another.

I slowly closed my eyes and started crying onto Max's shoulder. He was silent as I sobbed for what felt like an eternity. I felt my phone buzz, the Oura ring app notifying me that my heart rate was getting too high. Which meant he knew my heart rate was getting too high.

I quickly reached down and pulled the ring off. I didn't want him to know how deeply I was hurt.

"Blake... I think you should let him explain..." Max said after several minutes.

I blinked, picking my head up to look at him. "What?"

"I think you should let him explain. There has to be a reason that she was there." He was quiet before he added, "He loves you too much."

Another tear fell, one that I quickly wiped away.

I didn't want to talk anymore.

"I don't fly back for another 2 days... Do you mind if I stay here until I go back home?" I slowly asked him.

"Of course I don't mind. I wasn't lying when I said that I would help you in whatever way I could. You can stay in our guest bedroom." He smiled at me.

"Thank you." I laid back down on the couch, thinking about where to go from here.