The Last Chicane

Facing Fears

I was quiet for most of the drive, lost in thought. Contemplating on how and when to tell Charles what had been eating me alive ever since he made that comment in his bedroom.

Charles slowly reached across the center console, placing his hand on my inner thigh.

"I am sorry if what I said upset you earlier." He muttered. "I wasn't thinking."

I placed my hand on his. "It's not what you said that upset me..." I trailed off, turning my head to look out the window and leaning my head on the headrest.

He lightly squeezed my thigh. "Well, whatever it is. I want you to know that you can tell me, whenever you're ready. I won't push you. Okay?"

I smiled to myself. "Okay."

Everyone made it onto the boat and Charles had started towards the same spot that we had went to back when we first met. It was a ways off shore, but it was the best chance that we had of no one following us and taking pictures of us.

He dropped the anchor once we made it and the boys immediately jumped into the ocean, Charles hanging out on the deck still. Anxiety blossomed in my chest as they all just dove in without a second thought.

Tatum and Leighton had made their way to the front of the boat to lay out. Leighton had already laid down on the cushion before Tatum could even attempt to sit down.

Leighton had on a plain white bikini that made her look even more tan than she already was. Tatum had on a red one piece, which accentuated her baby bump.

"Are you okay?" Charles came up beside me. I hadn't realized that I was still in the same spot as when he was dropping the anchor.

I slowly nodded my head. "Yeah, I'm okay."

He reached out to rub my back. "Do you want to try today?" He nodded towards the ocean.

I just stared out towards the horizon. The blue ocean glistening back at me as the sun hit the surface. It was an invitation just as much as it was a warning.

Do it. Do this for you.

I slowly nodded my head. "Yeah... Yes." I said with determination. "I'm doing this."

He kept his eyes on me, making sure I wasn't going to change my mind.

He slowly guided me to the back of the boat to where the ladder was. The closer I got to the surface of the water, the more my footing became unsteady.

Charles turned around to face me. "You don't have to do this if you're not ready Blake. It's okay."

"Come on in! The water is so nice!" Lando shouted from where the boys were in the water, all of them floating around.

"You can do this." Max yelled, reassuring me.

I glanced back at Charles. "I'm doing this. I can do it."

I took some more steps to the edge of the boat. Charles dove in head first, disappearing beneath the surface for a couple of seconds before his head popped up again. He swam back to where I was standing on the boat and grabbed on.

"I'm right here. I'll stay here with you for as long as you need." He smiled up at me.

I took a deep breath and nodded my head. I slowly sat down on the ledge and slowly dipped my feet and legs into the ocean. My instincts made my legs immediately freeze, refusing to go any further into the water.

My breathing started to become shallow. I squeezed my eyes shut.

Come on Blake. Do it. You owe it to yourself. Don't be weak.