The Last Chicane

See you soon

Rolling over in bed, I saw Charles sleeping on his stomach, his head facing the opposite direction of me.

His breathing was steady, I could tell he was still peacefully sleeping.

I stared at him for a moment, warmth radiated from my chest.

Love. I thought. So this is what love feels like.

Smiling to myself, I slowly moved closer to him, careful not to wake him. I leaned down and started kissing his back, in between his shoulder blades.

His breathing paused for a second before picking back up, more shallow this time.

I smirked and started leaving a trail of kisses down his back until he slowly opened his eyes.

"Good morning." I said.

He tilted his head towards me, his eyes squinting from the light that was coming through the curtains.

A lazy smile grew on his face. "Good morning chérie."

He rolled over onto his back, the covers pooling around his waist with his abs on display. 

He scrunched his face at me. "What's that look for?"

I shook my head at him.

"I just love you, that's all." I whispered.

He leaned up and kissed me, lightly pushing me back until I lay flat on the bed. He propped himself up on his elbows, breaking the kiss and looking down at me.

"I love you too." He whispered back.

Looking up at him, my smile quickly faded. The happy mood I was just feeling quickly turned into sadness.

"I know this is extremely childish to say, but I don't want you to go back..." I trailed off, tilting my head to the side so I didn't have to look at him.

He sighed, "I know. I don't want to go either. Especially since the season is starting next weekend."

I nodded. I knew that once the season started it was going to become more difficult to see him.

"When will I get to see you again..?" I asked.

He tilted his head, thinking. "Well. I would love for you to come to all of the races. Even though I know you have work. But, any time you are off and you want to come, let me know and we will work it out. Don't worry about paying for the flights or any of that... okay?" He tilted my head back towards him.

He was quiet for a moment. "The race in Miami is the second weekend, and you're off. Would you like to come to that one?"

Nerves took root. That's only a couple weeks from now. What if my job found out?

I started chewing on my lip. "It's not that I don't want to... I'm just nervous... This is a whole new world for me. And what if my job finds out?"

He picked up my necklace that was around my neck. Showing me the aut viam inveniam aut faciam side, raising his eyebrows at me in reminder. 

"We will figure it out. Okay?" He reassured me.

I looked into his eyes for several seconds. He was always so sure of himself, and I admired that in him.

I sighed, and slowly nodded my head.

"Okay. What do I wear? Where do I go? Where do I sit?" The questions started overwhelming me.

He grinned. "Don't worry about any of that. Pierre's girlfriend, Kika, the one you met at the dinner, is going. Im sure she wouldn't mind helping you." He thought for a moment. "What about Tatum? I know she's been to a couple of the Spanish Grand Prix's. What if she went with you?"

He really was trying to make me comfortable in his world. I had to at least try.

"Okay..." I thought for another moment. "Would it be possible if Tessa went too... it would make me feel better if there was someone else that had equally no idea what to expect like me."

He smiled, genuinely smiled. I could tell this was making him happy. "Sure. I can work it out. I'll talk to Pierre, I'm sure you guys can stay with Kika in Alpine's garage during the race."

I took a deep breath. "Great..."

Distracting myself from my nerves, I got out of bed and headed into the  bathroom to shower.

I jumped in the shower, standing underneath the spray of the water. Eyes closed, I tried to block out all of the negative thoughts and nerves.

I could feel hi,  behind me. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my shoulder.

"What's wrong..?" He muttered.

I sighed. "Isn't it funny? Nurse me is so confident. Real me.... So insecure."

I grabbed the shampoo to start washing my hair.

He immediately took it out of my hands.

"Hey I need tha-" turning around to face him, he cut me off by pouring some shampoo in his hands and motioned for me to turn around. I did as he said, and he started to work it into my hair.

I froze, unsure of how to respond to his kind gesture.

"Blake. I love you for you. You don't have to be confident yet. This is all brand new to you. It's okay to be nervous." He reassured me.

I dropped my head, looking at my feet. My thoughts were drowning me. All of the possibilities were drowning me.

He finished washing my hair, and I turned around to face him. Linking my arms around his neck I gave him a kiss.

"What if everyone hates me...?"

"They will love you. And even the ones that don't, I love you. Besides. We don't have to tell anyone that we are together until we are ready."

I was still thinking about it as we both got out of the shower and got dressed.

I held his hand the whole way to the airport, not letting go of his hand until I absolutely had to.

Stepping out of my jeep, I walked around to the passenger side where he was standing, suitcase in hand.

My heart sank, knowing it would be a couple of weeks before I saw him in Miami.

"Don't look so sad. It'll fly by and we will be in Miami. Okay?" He said.

I slowly said, "Yeah. Okay. I'm still gonna miss you though."

"I'm gonna miss you too." He kissed me. "I love you."

I hesitantly kissed him back.

"I love you too. See you soon."