Don't Let Me Go (Book 1)

Chapter 77

''And believe me, Maria, when I say that I can be just as deadly to my very own... if Logan fucks up, I will hurt him badly and it would be all because of you'' I look down away from him, realizing that I am so fucked '' So what is it going to be Maria.... Are you sure you can move on with the son of the man who brought your family's misfortune or...?''

'' Don't..'' words remained trapped in my tongue

'' You say what?''

'' Don't....Don't hurt my family... they have nothing to do with this'' I pleaded and noticed from the corner of my eyes, his smile of satisfaction. He got me exactly where he wanted '' I swear... I would not do anything with what I know'' I gathered the courage to look at him, trying to avoid his gaze '' I will take it to my grave''

'' Maria... if you want me to believe you then do as I say and leave'' With that we fell into silence. I thought about my father and how cheerful he used to be until things got complicated for us, I thought of how much my mother has suffered and how we all thought that life was finally being fair to us then she discovered her illness, I thought of Malisa and how she was bullied during her early stage of schooling until she was able to surround herself with the right click. I thought of my life. Just when everything was beginning to seem right. Now this. What do I do, what do I say to my mother? All of it. I will have to tell her all of it.

'' Ok..'' I reached for the envelope'' I... I will leave'' Logan came to mind. What is going to happen between us? Is this how it is going to end, like this, I break up with him while taking his family money and secret with me.

'' Good... and I trust you will be smart to leave Logan out of this''

'' I see''

**********

Crying. I used to say it has been a while since I cried but not any more, I cry more often lately. I wanted to stop by the beach but didn't, Scared that I might run into Logan there even if I knew the chances were slim. I needed alcohol, something to clear my system. '' Maria?'' I sensed the excitement in Mother's voice the moment I walked into the house '' I sent the money to you did you...'' she paused when she came to the entrance. Noticing my mood '' Maria?.. are.. are you ok'' Mother hurried to me, placing her hand on both shoulders.

'' I... need a beer mother'' I forced a smile, trying to hold back the tears from breaking free for the third time today.

'' Maria'' worries in her tone '' What do you mean you need a beer, what is the matter''

'' I... I... I can't... I can't take this any more Mother'' it came raining down without control '' I can't Mother... Mother I am tired, I am tired of all this, I am tired of this messed up life.. I am tired of trying so hard, I am tired of holding it in, I am tired of trying Mother.... I....i can't... I can't do this any more'' I didn't realise that I was now on my kneel. My mother wrapped her arms around me, holding me tight, holding me close probably scared to let go

'' Oh, Maria'' trapped in the warmth of my mother's body. I can't remember the last time I cried in her arms. I can't remember the last time I let her see me this weak '' it's ok... it's alright... I am here'' she whispered to my ear while I sobbed.

Over 10 minutes, we remained in that position. Malisa was nowhere in sight and I was grateful. She has probably gone on an errand.

'' Maria'' Mother called when were were seated on the couch in the sitting room

'' Hmm'' she needs answers and I would have to give them to her, I didn't have a choice

'' Did...'' she hesitated '' God I don't know what to ask.... hmmm... did something happen, between you and Logan?'' pain in my chest at the mansion of Logan. Why? Is all this happening to me?

'' Mum'' I looked at her '' Mum, a lot has happened, a lot is happening mum and I...''

'' talk to me''

'' Mum.. let us leave''

'' what'' confusion flashed in her eyes

'' Let leave the country, Mum, let leave everything, everyone''

'' But Maria... we can't just leave. We don't even have the money for that and if...''

'' I have the money'' More confused by my words '' I have the money mother.. money to leave, to start over, I have the money''

'' Maria...'' suspicions tone '' Maria where did you get such money'' I would have to tell her, no matter what. It wasn't something I could avoid '' Maria!!'' she scolded this time '' Don't tell me...''

'' I..'' I cut her off but wasn't able to finish my sentence

'' You?''

'' I ammm... Mum''

'' Maria?''

'' Did... did you ever wonder how...father died'' She fell into deep thought

''Your father died from a car accident, why?''

'' What.... what if I said father was killed'' My mother went numb, I noticed from the way she fell into deep silence '' What... what if I say that father was killed by the man whose son I am dating'' I watched as all the colour on her face drained

'' What do you mean Maria? What do you mean killed? he died in a car accident

'' No Mother'' I let out in frustration, looking away from her '' The car accident was a plan to kill father.. that is why nothing was found in his body''

'' Stop this nonsense'' she stood up angrily '' Where are you getting all this bullshit from?''

'' Father once walked for Max construction didn't he''

'' I... I never told you that, how did you know''

'' After father was fired'' I began, telling her story of how father threatened Mr Richard with what he knew and how they got rid of him, I then told her how I found the document and how Richard got to know about it, told her we were in danger and we needed to leave '' For me to prove myself trustworthy, we need to leave as far away as possible, way from the company, the family and the county, I will cut all relationship I have with the family and....'' I then realised I was crying for the fourth time. '' I am sorry Mother'' I reached for my bag and took off the check, placing it on the table. '' I am sorry Mother... I am sorry for letting it get to this point'' unable to meet her gaze. I watched my silent, shocked and confused mother, turn around and begin walking away

'' I am back'' Malisa's voice is suddenly heard as she enters and walks into the seating room, holding a plastic bag. She stopped mid-way in confusion as mother, walked pass her to her room '' what is going on?'' Malisa walks to me '' are you...'' she kneels in a hurry to get a good view of my face. '' crying''

'' Good night Malisa'' I grabbed the envelope, my bag. I walked out as well

'' seriously?'' I heard Malisa yell after I closed the door behind me. '' What is going on here?'' Suddenly, my phone rang. I reached for it to see it was Logan, fuck. I immediately ended the call and switched off my phone. I don't want to do this. I don't want to leave him. It kills me inside but I have to. I have to choose between him and my family. And I choose my family. I have to protect them. Unlike him, I do not have the power. He told me to use him but he can not be up against his father. It is a losing game and I don't want him to get hurt.