my wild mate

chapter 44

Kayleighs pov .

I'm sat at Emily's house with Shannon. We said we'd watch olive for her while she waits for carter to wake up from surgery. I'm sat having cuddles with olive "have you ever thought of having kids kay?"

I turn to Shannon "honestly" she nods at me "no, I've always put myself first, I always loved the parties, drinking, smoking and don't get me wrong I love a spliff. I love having my own space, my own time and doing what I want"

"That's understandable" she smiles at me

"But since meeting josh there has been a little twinge that I'm blaming on my wolf " I laugh nervously "don't get me wrong you won't be an auntie any time soon but yeah I hope so in the next 4-5 years I'll have a little josh one day"

Shannon is smiling at me "I would love that! I think you and josh would be great parents but yeah a baby is alot, it's a massive commitment"

"What about you? You ever wanted kids?" She has a sad smile on her face when she answers me

"Yeah, I've always loved kids and often had dreams of being a mum one day but being gay obviously makes that a little more difficult"

"Yeah but you have a few options don't you? Adoption, ivf etc?"

"It's all a long process though kay. It's a long emotional and financial commitment"

"Its something you and evie can talk about when the time is right though isn't it?"

"Yeah. I just don't know if I have it in me to go down that long path. Maybe I'm just destined to be an auntie"

"Maybe not but you and evie can cross the bridge when it comes to it"

Olive starts fussing in my arms "ahh shannon! Help!"

She laughs and takes the baby "you getting hungry little miss"

We go into the kitchen and get some milk out the fridge before warming it up in hot water. Shannon is rocking olive while shushing her to keep her calm, once the bottle is ready she goes to the lounge to feed her while I make us a coffee. As I finish making it josh walks in. He comes over to me and spins me around to kiss me. I melt into him and kiss him. I pull away reluctantly "Hey, everything okay ?"

"Yeah just needed that. I'm stressed out and needed to take my mind off it all. How's olive?"

"She's having a bottle, shannon is in the lounge. Have you seen Emily? "

He shakes his head "Nah. Shes waiting for carter to wake up so I'll talk to her another time"

We hear the door open again and Emily comes in. She freezes when she sees josh. Her eyes are still cold and angry "alpha" she nods to him and walks away to the lounge. I guess to find her baby.

"I'll leave you guys to it. I'll go check on carter and Harrison"

I make Emily a drink as well and take them to the lounge, the girls on the sofa and Emily now has olive in her arms giving her a bottle. She smiling at her full of love. I place the drinks down on the table "here you go guys"

They smile up at me "Emily, I don't mean to be disrespectful in your home-"

"Then dont"

"Well it has to be said. Josh is my mate and I'm your future luna so-"

"This is my house kayleigh.  I don't care if you're the future luna, you don't disrespect me in my own home!"

Shannon stands up and raises her hands infront of her "whooo let's chill for a second, Emily hear her out. Kayleigh won't be disrespectful"

Emily stares at me and raised her eye brow

"Please hear me out and let me finish.  We both know josh and carter are not only alpha and beta. They're best friends, well more like brothers" I shrug my shoulders "and I know you worry about him, the same way as I worry for josh and Shannon worries for evie. Me and Shannon come from a family of alphas etc. As you know Shannon's dad was the alpha, carter's dad was the beta"

She nods "and?"

"Evie is my cousin, my sister abi is her beta. My uncle was the alpha and my father was his beta. We all understand your fears. We've lived it our whole lives but carter is also his own man, I don't think he'd ever leave joshs side. The same way I know abi wouldn't leave evie"

"What's your point kayleigh!" Emily shouts at me obviously getting pissed off with my rambling

"The point is, whether  you like it or not, it's not your choice if Carter Is beta. It's his choice. The same as me and Shannon can't make josh or evie stop being alphas. It's in their blood. They've trained their whole lives for this and if it's something carter wants to continue to do then you have no say in it and on that note I'll leave you to it. Goodnight girls"

I leave the house and walk to the hospital.  It's late but I know I won't be able to sleep. I see Irene doing her rounds and she's smiles when she sees me. "Hi Irene. How are our men doing?"

"They're okay but not out the woods just yet "

"Can you show me to carter's room please?"

"Of course. Follow me"

I follow her for a few minutes until she points at a door. I open it and see carter lying in bed he's looking better than I thought. He smiles and weakly says hi to me as I walk in, I take a seat on the chair next to his bed and sigh.  "Well dont you look like a ray of sunshine, who pissed on your cornflakes?" He smiles weakly at me.

"Your mate"

His smile falls and he stares at me. A look full of confusion, hurt and anger.

"She's blaming josh for you getting hurt carter"

"What?"

"Listen I don't want to course arguments but he's my mate. She's blaming him for you getting hurt and says she doesn't want you being a beta anymore. I tried to talk to her but she's having none of it"

I'm not an emotional person but my eyes tear up, I feel like shit stirrer and I don't want him and Emily arguing but she can't keep blaming josh. He wasn't even in the room it's not like he pulled the trigger!

"She worries about me kay, more so now we have olive"

"I get that man, I do. I worry about josh, evie and abi all the time but it's part of the job, it's who you are. You won't step down will you? It isn't joshs fault! You know he'd never hurt you and he's been blaming himself since Emily slapped it into him"

I look up at him "quite literally slapped it into him"

He shakes his head "she's been more emotional since olive but that's no reason to disrespect her alpha like that and no I would never leave josh. Anyone who knows me will know I wouldn't. It isn't his fault and I would never blame him"

I smile at him "I know, you'll need to talk to josh and Emily as I don't think she'll forgive him any time soon and I need to get back to wolf creek Wednesday. I need this shit sorted by then "

"Of course luna" he smiles at me

"Not yet"

"Don't worry kay, I've got this. Go home and rest, I'll see you tomorrow"

"Night carter"

I walk out and go and find my mate. We both have alot of stress and anger to release and I know the perfect way to do it. I smile to myself as I walk out the hospital and mind link josh to see where he is.