Chaos In My Mind

This is it.

This is it.
I’ve made my choice,
And in this silence, I find my voice.
The world’s too heavy, the sky too gray,
And I just want myself to be gone, away.

I’ve smiled enough, I’ve played along,
Told myself I could be strong.
But inside I’m rotting, piece by piece,
Begging for this endless pain to cease.

Nobody knows, nobody cares,
They see the laughter, unaware.
I’ve perfected this act, my flawless lie,
While I’ve been dying on the inside.

I laugh with friends, I walk through light,
But when I’m alone, it’s endless night.
I wish someone would see past the mask,
But they never do, they never ask.

You'll say you never knew, I seemed so bright,
While I’ve been choking in plain sight.
I’m tired of fighting this battle alone,
Of calling this hollow body a home.

I wanted help, I really did,
But I’ve been too good at keeping it hid.
Now there’s no more strength to pretend,
I’m done. This is the end.

So when you read this, understand,
It wasn’t sudden, it wasn’t planned.
I’ve been slipping for far too long,
I just can't keep holding on.