Just Pretend

Chapter 65 - Mini Omen

It's the last show of the Europe tour and as much as I support and love what Noah and the boys do I cannot wait to be home where I can feel sorry for myself without an audience. My body aches, I'm constantly feeling queasy and trying to keep up with the appearance that everything's okay is really doing a number on me.

"So Belgium, this is our last Europe show and I know you all know this one so you're gonna help me out, yeah?" Noah breathlessly shouts through the mic, his voice rough but mesmerising. He paces the stage his eyes locking with mine, he winks subtly a sparkle in his eyes. "Before I get into it, I want to thank you all. Every single one of you makes all of this so worth it. Every fucking show we've played is because of you guys and man, when I tell you that touring is rough it really fucking is. We live out suitcases, we miss home and we run on adrenaline and coffee but you guys make it all so worth it." He runs his hand through his hair pushing it out of his face. "This tour I've had someone so special to me by my side the whole time and honestly I don't think I could have done it without them. It's been our hardest tour yet and every step of the way they've been my rock, damn, they've been my fucking life line showing me what real strength looks like. I don't need to tell you that but this one... this one's for you..." Noah says the words so confidently turning to face me and I take a step back so I don't get photographed. Sadie holds my arm to steady me as I almost trip on a cable and I know I have tears rolling down my face. "Can we get our flashlights out, I wanna light this whole damn fucking field up. Y'all ready?"

I can see the glow from the field and I quickly wipe away the tears that are rolling down my cheeks, Noah's eye contact doesn't waver freezing time still. The intro to "Just Pretend" starts and I wait for him to sing that first line of the song that now means so fucking much.

"I'm not afraid..." He finally turns to the crowd giving them his full attention and Sadie subtly hands me a tissue.

"He's so in love with you it makes me sick. He's so in love with you that he just told the whole damn world." Sadie says and I let out a small laugh as I take the tissue drying my tears.

"I guess he did." I scrunch the tissue in my hand watching Noah in his element on stage.

"You know this is gonna break the fucking internet Mar." Sadie replies and I nod my head in agreement.

"I know but I really don't care anymore." I reply wrapping my arm around her resting my head on her shoulder and we enjoy the rest of the show watching our boys.

                                                 *

"Noah, what the fuck was that?" Folio asks brashly as they exit the stage. Sadie and I follow them through the back of where the trailer is as they gather their stuff.

"You stared at Mar the whole time. Y'all so fucked." Nick laughs swinging his arm around Sadie's shoulders pulling her into him planting a kiss on the side of her head.

"I really couldn't give more of a fuck if I tried." Noah replies pulling me into him holding me closely. "Let's get food? I'm fucking starving." He laughs kissing me so passionately clearly on a high from his announcement.

"I'm always down for food." Folio says happily at the change of subject and they all start to gather their things.

I start picking up masks and hoodies as I feel someone gently tugging on my arm.

"Mar?"

"Jolly?"

"Are you? Y'know?" Jolly asks his voice quiet so no one overhears. I nod a small nod biting my lip unsure on what to say.

"When did you figure it out?" I ask not wanting to draw attention to us, my heart pounding so loud I can feel it in my ears.

"Berlin. You seemed more than run down with a sickness bug and the way that Noah looks at you and has been around you is more protective. It's different." He smiles kindly.