TMD: Preferences|Imagines|Oneshots 2

untitled (d.p.) (requested)

(A/N: This oneshot was requested by AshTray367. I'm so sorry for your loss. I left this oneshot without a song in the title because I couldn't find one that felt appropriate so you can just sub in any song you want.)

(DISCLAIMER: This oneshot contains parental death and grieving. If these topics are triggering to you, please feel free to skip this oneshot!)

       It had all happened so fast. One minute I was sitting in my room doing my homework and then sitting in the hospital waiting room the next. When the doctor came out, the sad expression on his face told me everything I needed to know. My mom was gone. 

       After leaving the hospital in the early hours of the morning and arriving home, I immediately went to my room. I got into bed and pulled the covers up over my head. I'd felt numb at the hospital but here, back home, the dam burst. I cried until I finally cried myself to sleep. 

       When I first woke up the next day, I had almost convinced myself that it had all been a dream. That I'd get out of bed and go downstairs to the kitchen and my mom would be there, making breakfast like she always did. But the more I woke up, the more reality came crashing down on me. The doctor's words echoing in my head.

      "We did everything we could. I'm so sorry but...we lost her."

       If I had any tears left I would have cried but I was all dried out. When my alarm eventually went off, I slammed my hand down on it to silence it, nearly breaking the poor clock. I rolled over onto my side and looked out the window. The wind blew through the tree outside my window, the leaves seemingly waving at me. I pulled the covers over my head again, intent on blocking out the world.

       I just laid there and thought of my mom. Everything about her. All the memories. The sound of my phone ringing pulled me from my thoughts. I knew it was Dean calling from Chicago, as he did every morning when he knew I was awake, and briefly considered not answering. But I knew I had to.

       "Hello?" I asked into the receiver.

       "Morning babe! How are you?" Dean's voice asked through the phone.

       "I..." I trailed off.

       "Babe?" Dean asked.

       I choked back a sob. "She's gone, Dean."

       "What? Who's gone?" Dean asked, confusion evident in his voice.

       "My mom!" I sobbed. And just like that, the tears were back. I sobbed into the phone for what felt like forever. When the tears finally ebbed, I wiped my face with the sleeve of my hoodie. If I hadn't heard his breathing on the phone I would have thought Dean had hung up. But he was still on the line, patiently waiting for me to calm down.

       "Babe, I'm so sorry. How did it happen?" Dean asked, gently.

       I told him the whole story. I was surprised I actually got all of it out without breaking down again.

       "I wish you were here with me. I really need you, Dean." I said, clutching the phone to my ear.

       "I wish I was too, Y/N." Dean said. There was a static-y sound on the phone, like he was moving around. "You should get some more sleep. You sound exhausted."

       "Yeah." I said, sniffling. "I think I'm going to. Well, I'll try at least."

       "Okay. I'll talk to you later. I love you, Y/N." Dean said.

       "I love you, too." I said back.

       We said our goodbyes and hung up. I checked the clock and it was only around 9:30 AM. Sighing, I settled down into bed again and pulled my covers back up. Surprisingly, I fell asleep.

~~~

       When I woke up the second time today, I peeked my head out from under the covers. Looking out the window, the sun was starting to set. 'I guess I really needed the sleep.' I thought. As I sat up and my covers fell from around my head, I was surprised to see Dean, asleep in the chair in the corner of my room.

       "Dean?" I called out.

       Waking with a start, Dean nearly fell out of the chair. Righting himself, he wiped his eyes before he looked at me. "Hey, babe." He said, his voice sounding sleepy.

       "What-what are you doing here?" I asked, still stunned.

       Dean let out a big yawn before getting up from the chair to sit beside me on my bed. "Did you really think I wasn't going to come to you?"

       I looked at him with my jaw dropped. "You drove 6 hours, just to be with me?" I asked.

       "Of course I did, Y/N. I will always be here when you need me." Dean said. He grabbed my hand and stroked the back of it with his thumb.

       The simple action had me crying all over again. I all but launched myself into his arms, burying my face into the side of his neck. Dean just held me as I cried, stroking my hair and making shushing sounds. When I finally got the tears under control, I pulled back to look at Dean.

       "She's gone. She's really gone, Dean." I whispered.

       "I know, Y/N. I'm so sorry." Dean said back, wiping the remaining tears from my cheeks.

       We adjusted ourselves so Dean was sitting up against my headboard and I was pulled into his side, my head resting on his shoulder, and his arms firmly around me. We sat there in silence for a few minutes before the sound of my stomach growling caught both of our attentions.

       "When was the last time you ate?" Dean asked.

       "I don't know. Sometime yesterday." I said, my cheek squished against his shoulder.

       "I'll order us a pizza." Dean said, reaching for my phone on my side table.

      "I'm not hungry." I said almost automatically.

       "Okay." Dean said, still dialing on the phone. "You don't have to eat right now but maybe you'll feel different in a little while."

       I nodded, not having the energy to argue with him. After he hung up the phone, Dean rewrapped his arms around me. "Do you want to talk or just sit?"

       I considered his words. "Just sit. For now." I said, not really ready to talk.

       "Okay." Dean said back, hugging me into his side.

       And we just sat. No words were needed. I wasn't ready to talk about it yet but I knew when I was, Dean would be there to listen. 

(A/N: This oneshot is dedicated to the memory of the mother of AshTray367. Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts. <3)