Septiplier One Shots

You Are My Sunshine

Warning! Mentions of suicide, cutting, depression, etc.

(Mark's P.O.V.)

It's only been a month since the funeral, two months since we got the call. I still remember the call, I remember it like it was yesterday, and I'll never forget it.

***(flashback)

I was sitting on the couch, watching TV, when my phone started buzzing. It was April. I frowned. She was supposed to be studying. Why was she calling? I picked up my phone and answered.

"Hello?" Was the first thing I said. What I heard next wasn't what I wanted to hear though.

"Um... Hello Mr. Fischbach. You are April's father, yes?" I heard a male voice, someone who sounded about my age. I nodded. 

"Yeah, that's me. Who am I speaking too?" I asked. 

"My name's Officer Jones. It's... It's urgent. Is April's other parent there?" He asked. I nodded again, now incredibly confused and worried. April wasn't one to get in trouble. But is it possible she had, just once?

"Seán!" I yelled up the stairs, and soon he came barreling down, sitting next to me. I took his hand, playing with the ring on his finger like I always did. 

"What is it?" He asked, his voice calm, happy. It didn't last that way for long. I shrugged and put the phone on speaker. 

"You're on speaker Officer Jones." I said, and I heard a sigh. This greatly confused Seán and once again I shrugged. 

"I'm very sorry." The officer started and by then worry was the prime emotion in both Seán and I.

"Why? What happened?" Seán asked. It was silent for a moment. 

"We found April about half an hour ago. She jumped off the church roof." Officer Jones said it quietly, but it didn't matter. Seán was already in tears, and he hugged me. He hugged me and cried, and sobbed, and I just sat there in shock. "I'm sorry." The officer said once more before hanging up. I couldn't manage to cry, but Seán couldn't manage to stop.

*** (present day)

Later that day we found a suicide note in April's bedroom. She had  been bullied at school for a long period of time, she was trapped in depression, and though she loved us with all her heart, we were the only good in her life and it just wasn't enough for her. The month went by, the funeral came. That was almost as bad as the call. I still couldn't cry, Seán still couldn't stop.

And now it's been a total of two months since her suicide, and Seán in still in a deep state of depression over it. I was able to pull myself out, try to comfort him, but he doesn't let me. I knock on the bedroom door, opening it to see Seán on the bed, staring at the wall with tears staining his cheeks like always.

"Hey." I say softly, but he doesn't even acknowledge the fact that I'm there. I go and stand at the foot of the bed. "You should come down and eat."

"Don't feel like it." He says, his voice raspy and quiet from not talking. I sigh, and look at the ground.

"Seán, I'm sad too but..."

"Are you?!" That set him off. He sits up, staring at me with pure sadness. "Are you really? Cause I haven't seen you cry once! Not when we got the call! Not at the funeral!" 

"Yes! I am sad! I am miserable!" I say, trying to keep my voice calm. "I loved her just like you did, but I know she wouldn't was us sitting here depressed." I say, going quiet at the end. 

He inhales shakily. "We saw the signs. We saw the damn signs. We saw her cutting, and we mentioned it, and she said she was fine, and that's all we did. That's all we fucking did! We should have stopped her! We could have stopped her!! God..." He cries, putting his head in his hands. I go over to him, sitting behind him and wrapping my arms around his small body, laying him on my chest as I lay on the headboard. 

"I know. We could have. But she made her decision, and she's happier now. As much as I want to believe we could have helped, I know we couldn't have. No one could." I say it, playing with the ring on Seán's finger like I used too. He sobs once before whispering.

"I just wish she fucking told us..." His voice is so broken, so full of sadness and tears it makes you want to do anything you can to help him. But I know that for now, we just need to stop and cry, and take our time.

"Me too." I say, and I start rocking us back and forth slowly. "And I don't know why she didn't. But she loved us, you know that. And we will always love her. Till the day we die, and after." I say and he nods, crying and crying. He can't stop crying.

"I just can't believe she's gone..." He says it so quietly I barely heard him, but he spoke the exact words I've been thinking for the past two months. I inhale and I nod, showing that I agree. And then I sing, softly, quietly, just how I used to sing to April when she was younger, and even when she was sixteen, a month before she died.

"You are my sunshine... My only sunshine... You make me happy... When skies are grey... You never know, dear... How much I love you... Please don't take, my sunshine away..." This makes him cry harder, clutching onto me for dear life. But I continue. "The other night, dear... As I lay sleeping... I dreamt I held you in my arms... When I awoke, dear... I was mistaken... So I hung my head, and cried..." He's calmed down some.

I sing the first verse again. "You are my sunshine... My only sunshine... You make me happy... When skies are grey... You never know, dear... How much I love you... Please don't take... My sunshine... Away..." And by then, Seán's asleep, and I'm the one crying. I wrap my arms around my husband tighter, crying into his relaxed shoulder. And I just cry. For the first time since this has happened, I cry. And I don't object when Seán hugs me and sings to me instead.

A/N: Sorry for breaking all your hearts. I've just had that song stuck in my head for a while, and I got the idea for this... So yeah... I'm sad too, don't worry. This got to me too <3

But I am gonna say, if any of you out there are thinking about suicide, don't. You are an amazing, wonderful person, and there is somebody out there who loves you even if you think there isn't. You would be missed, even if you think you wouldn't, and people will cry, even if you think they shouldn't. So if you are having suicidal thoughts, tell someone, get help, and remember that you will always be loved. Especially by me, cause I love every single one of you.

And I'm always there. You can always message me, and I will always answer. So please, never take your life. Cause you are beautiful, and I will miss you if you leave. <3