24. soulmate

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My heart hurt every time I looked at Eleanor when she came off the phone with Freya

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My heart hurt every time I looked at Eleanor when she came off the phone with Freya. How she held in her tears until she got off the phone.

This women was stronger than I cared to give her credit for.

"I will make sure you go back to her." I promised.

I took one of Elle's hands into mine.

"You wouldn't change any of this Harry? Look how complicated life is with me." Eleanor murmured.

"We have to stop doing this. Doubting each other when shit is hard because I think time and time again, it has been proven. We simply are meant for one another. No matter how hard it gets." I answered, hoping that it helped.

"I'm asking how you feel about this. The honest truth Harry."

"The honest truth is that this sucks. I didn't sign up for this yet here I am. But it is with Freya and you, which is where I want to be. You keep asking the same question differently, like you're expecting me, to change my answer or something. It's not going to change Eleanor." I said firmly.

"I love you so much. I don't know where I would be without you." She sighed, burying herself in my chest. I enjoyed the feeling for a second before Eleanor was pulling away.

"I worry every time you don't say anything back. Even if it's for the lack of saying just do it." Eleanor grumbled, trying to pull away but I tighten my hold.

"Stop fussing for a second and hear yourself." I chuckled.

"I do hear myself quite well mind you." She huffed.

"I never thought I would hear those words from your mouth again. That you would come to love the monster." I admited aloud a thought I had been keeping to myself.

"I don't know the extent of your monstrosity per say. I only know the man I love, you." Eleanor murmured.

"Do you want too?" I asked her.

Eleanor pulled out from my arms and looked at me wide-eyed.

"Are you being serious?" She said, eyes searching for a sign that I was not.

"I am. I want you to know me. To really know me, so that then I can fully trust you when you say you love me." I continued to put myself out there. Eleanor claimed I didn't do that much the first time around.

There were also many secrets that weren't mine to tell. But at that point, I could be an open book and hope she would still love me.

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