Her Rogue

20. I love you

It was close to 4 am. 

We were both in my bed. 

I couldn't sleep, I was just looking at my roof. 

A plain beige color. 

It was pretty dark so I was only making an assumption of it. Didn't look at my roof before.

I looked at my side, my sleeping beauty. He was drained after everything we had done. He was sleeping from 2 am. 

Lucky.

It was overthinking everything that had just happened. I got up and started pacing back and forth in my room. 

My mind was racing, I do not know how to feel, I could feel him know, I could feel his emotions.

"Okay, let's think this logically. You marked your mate again... You had really, really hot sex with your mate..." I started babbling, sighing at the memories that had just happened a couple of hours ago. 

I start stretching like a cat on the floor, not really knowing what just happened.

"Did you have more than once hot-really hot- sex with your mate?" I crack my knuckles, ready to make the handstand on my bare arms. 

I feel overwhelmed. 

It was hard ignoring my feelings about the situation before, now I was fucked. In all the ways.

"I had sex with my mate and now it is almost official," I scoff, something in my surroundings was off and I didn't like it. 

Why do I feel so uneasy? I fall from my handstand, really feeling odd.

"Do I regret it?" I ask myself, trying to go back to the position I was before. 

Helps me concentrate. 

I don't know the answer.

No, that is not right. I do know the answer. 

"Well, did you?" I almost get a heart attack hearing the voice of Malcolm, that I fall from my handstand. 

Fuck, I forgot that I no longer am alone in my room and I have to share it.

"You are awake," I state, cursing all my ancestors. 

You could see the dread all over my body. I wanted to say something else but I was stuck. I could only see his tired face and the look of impotence. 

As if he knew I couldn't answer the question.

"Yeah, I am," He says getting up, putting his boxers on. I had on his black t-shirt and my panties. 

I nod, biting my tongue, trying to smile, not looking in his eyes. 

He can see right through my bullshit.

"You don't want to answer," It wasn't a question, we both knew I wasn't going to say anything and I hated that. 

I hated that I wasn't great at talking about feelings or how I didn't like to be forced into a relationship with someone I barely knew.

That is when I knew my answer.

"I need a shower," He shoves me almost, not looking at me, leaving me alone. 

I curse again, for once that I had a clear answer. 

This was all a misunderstanding.

I knew you were bad at this, Angel. But this is just utterly ridiculous. Go to him, let me talk through you, okay? I sigh, slightly smiling, for once happy and relieved that she wanted to take control.