M.Y.GxBTS Not Enough (EDITING)

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Recap:

Jun Ki's POV

The colourless sunrise reaches through his window and onto his eyes, they flutter open before widening in fear. By now I'm an inch from his face, boring into his dark eyes mouth my own.

"Hey, miss me little bro?" I smile at him as he whimpers.

Yoongi's POV

Is this a nightmare? No, it feels too real. I whimper again when his calloused hand strokes my cheek.

"I've missed you so, so much." His dark voice laced with lust. His eyes trace over my blanketed body before ripping it off, making me shudder from the cold. "You can't believe how hard it is to try and get hard to my girlfriend, when I'm with you though," He points to his bulge. "Just looking at you turns me on. Although, I think you would look so much better with those big clothes off." His hand reaches for my shirt, making me instinctively move backwards and cry out. "Stop!"

He slaps me across my face making me stop and cradle my cheek. "Ah-ah-ah. Have you forgotten? I own you, I can do whatever I want." The familiar phrase makes me freeze, paralysed like I'm in some kind of trance. It's just like old times, I don't want this. I need to move, but I can't. My body won't listen to me.

He goes back for my shirt and this time succeeds, pulling off my shirt and putting my scars and my body on full display from the waist and up. "You have done a lot more damage since last time, glad to know you've been punishing yourself for being a mistake." It's true, I was a mistake. I wasn't supposed to be born, (A/N: this is true irl btw) Mom's late-night sobbing reminded me of it, Jun Ki hyung's too, everyday, since I was born.

He drags his arms up my arms, across the visible scars and down my chest. Across sensitive spots until he reaches my pants, grabbing them he stares my eyes down. "Oh how I have missed this." He states before he rips my pants off me, boxers with it as he stares my body down. I start shaking in fear and from the cold as he moves his lips on my body. I whimper as his open mouthed kisses reach my sensitive spot on my neck, my breath hitching and hot tears escaping down my cheeks.

He hastily unbuckles his belt and pulls his pants down uncoordinatedly, adjusting my head and his hips accordingly before speaking, "Get ready my Yoongi, now be a good boy and open up."

•••

My tears haven't stopped rolling down my face, my legs pulled up to my chest and my head in my knees, trying to be as quiet as possible. My ass hurts from it being so rough, my scalp burns. I'm pretty sure some hair had been pulled out, my chest and neck hurts from the biting and hickeys. He scratched my fresh cuts, making them bleed, I hope I didn't get any blood on the bed or the carpet.

The sun has risen quite above the horizon. I think it's 7 or 8 in the morning. I'm glad Seokjin hyung didn't come back to his room or he would have seen, did Jun Ki hyung know that he wasn't going to be in here? An alarm suddenly goes off on the other side of the room making me jump. Seokjin hyung's alarm.

I slowly get up from my position, everything hurts as I make my way over to the digital alarm clock, '8:09 am.' being displayed in red, continuously flashing. I hit the button on the top, successfully switching off the alarm. I walk to my dresser, pulling out long, baggy sweatpants and a big hoodie and make my way to the bathroom.

I wish I could just sleep forever, I am so tired. I want to cut but I think I'd pass out in the middle of it, besides, I don't think I could do anymore damage. I turn my head towards the mirror, studying my tear stained face and bruised, bloody body. Hickeys line my neck and down my chest, reaching my belly button. Bruises cover my limbs and back mixed with scratches and blood. I place my clothes on the sink and instinctively go towards the scale, the number reading '45.3kg' (99.9lbs). Another tear escapes my eye, at least I finished one of my goals, even if it isn't good enough.

I step off the scale and turn the shower on, letting it the water warm up and hopefully suffocate me with steam. I step in the shower, feeling the blood and tears roll off my body. More tears escape my eyes mixing with the water of the shower, my legs barely able to hold me up for long.

"Today is the last day." I say to myself in relief. Today is the day I will finally be able to let go. I know I will write stupid notes in the end for everyone in the band because I can't say it in person. I'm not enough for everyone.

I stayed in the shower until I was about to fall down. Slowly getting out and drying myself before putting on clothes and going to write notes.

•••

I finish the notes, more tears threatening to spill as I put them in a pile and hide them in my pillowcase. I collapse as my eyes close on the bed, wrapped up in a soft blanket where only hours ago Jun Ki had been here.