Reintegration program - Elmax

Chapter 53 : Family

Jane was in Joyce's car, holding her bag in her arms and looking in the void. The two were in direction of Joyce's home.

- What's wrong sweetie? You seem preoccupied, told softly the mother.

- There is something wrong with me, answered calmly Jane.

- I see nothing wrong with you.

- I spent one night with her but, my brain was still craving, I couldn't stop thinking of it while I was with her...this is so wrong! And, I couldn't stop thinking that the addicted me was the one she preferred and not the one I am, because I know I'm not the same as before, I feel more weak and like a piece of shit and maybe she liked the strong Jane...and this fucking nightmare, I'm the best to ruin everything.

- What are you talking about? Max spent an amazing night!

- Yeah, she certainly said that to not upset me...mumbled the ex-prisoner.

- Did you take something?

- What?

- You told me you were craving, did you take something or tried to find something?

- Uh...no.

- And you think you're weak!? Jane, you resisted to something you used to take every day for years! You have no idea of how hard it is and you did it! Because you're strong! And Max, I'm sure she understands, I told her, she knew you could have hard times but she still wanted you to come, she just wanted to spend time with you. Now, you're doubting because you're not feeling good, and it's normal, but today, you made a huge step, smiled Joyce.

- A huge step? frowned Jane.

- Yes, you admitted that you had a problem, which is a really good thing for your recovery, now, we can go further.

- Go further?

- Yeah, but we don't need to talk about it now.

- I thought I was already feeling better!

- Jane, a withdrawal is not just about stopping taking it, now, you have to keep going like that and to understand how it began and what to do to avoid it.

- It's going to hurt?

- Um, not physically, but maybe emotionally, but it's necessary.

- Ok...

Joyce didn't like to see her like that, but she knew she would make it, Jane was strong and she already did the worst part, now, it was just a matter of time. She caressed her cheek before tousling her hair, making her smile.

- You'll meet my other son today, and his girlfriend, said Joyce.

- Ok.

- It doesn't bother you, right?

- No, it's not my house, you do what you want, shrugged Jane.

- It will be fine, smiled the mother.

Jane nodded. She wasn't sure it would be fine, why would they like her? She didn't care anyway, she was used to it.

Jonathan was preparing the lunch while Nancy was placing the plates on the table. Will was on the couch, watching TV.

- You could help us, told his big brother.

- No, I won't help you to prepare a meal for that garbage, grumbled Will.

- She is a human being, and mom is doing everything to help her.

- She doesn't deserve help!

- Why not?