Away We Go • 2 • Formula One

Chapter 20

Knowing that I had two weeks until the next race was a huge relief, especially when the next race just so happened to be where I had one of, if not, the biggest crashes of my racing career. Racing around the streets of Baku used to be one of my favourite things to do, however not anymore. Just the thought of it brings an uneasy feeling to the pit of my stomach and psyching myself up to do specific preparation for the race is proving to be a challenge. As per usual, I put on a smile of reassurance whenever I was in a room with a team member. If people start knowing my doubts, then they'll start to doubt me.

I decided to spend a few days in China following the Grand Prix so that I could be with Lewis until he could be transferred to a hospital in the UK. He rewatched the race with me, offering praise at the decisions I made. He couldn't offer much insight on overtakes as I didn't have any need in the race to complete one, however that didn't mean that he didn't point out how he would've got past me if he had been racing. Hearing him speak about the race made me realise how much his accident hurt him in more than a physical sense. Being an F1 driver is like an addiction, and it causes pain to not be able to take part. I had an idea of how he was feeling but couldn't quite bring him the relief of what racing would.

Lewis had a few questions for me, the main one being why Esteban walked out onto the podium soaking wet. I held the memory of the cool down room and podium very fondly in my memory...

Once in the cooldown room, I slipped off my helmet and placed it carefully onto the table, replacing it on my head with the #1 cap provided. I let out a long exhale through slightly parted lips before taking a short swig from my water bottle. Max and Esteban were still being weighed, however I had already done so and was waiting for the ceremony to start. I couldn't wipe the smile from my face even if I wanted to. Every time I thought about my win, an overwhelming feeling of joy would overcome me. Today was more than a win for me.

"There she is!" Esteban cheered as he entered the room. The camera which had been focussed on me in the chair turned to point at the door as Max followed in behind him. As Esteban put a cap on his head, he leaned over to high-five me with his spare hand. "You were on your own for, like, the whole race. Crazy!"

I chuckled lightly. "Yeah. The only battles I had were during the opening few laps and after pit stops; the rest was a breeze. You could've at least tried to make it harder for me," I teased, biting my tongue between my open grin as I glanced between my former teammate and Max.

"You weren't the fastest, though," Max said with a shrug, casually leaning back in his chair. A smug smile found its way to his lips as he locked eyes with me. "That was me."

"Finishing fast isn't always a good thing," I replied with raised eyebrows, hoping he would get what I was insinuating.

"Neither is finishing first."

"Yeah, you'd know a lot about that, wouldn't you?"

"Hey!" Esteban interrupted, putting his arms out so that a palm faced Max and I individually. "My daughter is watching at home."

I cleared my throat and adjusted my posture so that I was sitting more upright. "So," if Esteban wanted a change in topic, I was going to make it about him, "how did you get a For- Racing Point on the podium?"

"I have the Ferrari team to thank, as well as their drivers making contact after the safety car which required Charles to have a front wing change."

My jaw dropped in surprise. "No way!" Esteban pointed to the screen in the room, which just so happened to be showing the exact highlight he was talking about. It looked as if Seb was making a move up the inside and Charles turned in and hit the side of Seb's car. Charles did have the racing line, but it did look like Charles was leaving the door open for a switch. It looked like just a racing incident to me, a consequence of the safety car bunching up the pack. "And here I was thinking that it was down to a bad strategy."