Just Another Sappy Love Story

22. Ren

"Hey Kyo." I smile at my best friend, as we walk side by side heading to the mall.

"Sup dog?"

I burst out laughing, as he said that with such a complete serious look on his face. "Man give up the thug life, you just don't fit that bill."

"Yah, because I'm too hipsta!" Kyo strikes a pose in the middle of the sidewalk. People around us stare and mutter, while they walk past shaking their heads.

My laughing grows even harder, as I have to grab his arm to hold myself up so as to not fall down to the sidewalk. Kyo soon joins me, in my fit of hysterical laughing.

Tears come to my eyes from laughing so hard. I gaze up at my best friend to see his reddish brown hair a complete mess, and his glasses half off his face.

"Fuck I wish I video recorded that." I laugh out as I reach my hand up, and push his glasses up. "That was the greatest thing ever."

Kyo grins and takes a bow. "I am happy to make ya just laugh like that again Ren." He grins. "Ok but on the serious side, what were you going to say?" He nudges my arm as we continue on our way to the mall.

"I wanted to thank you for coming with me today. I suck at buying clothes." I groan out.

"I am happy too. Besides I think this is freaking adorable! You want to buy a new outfit to wear on your date."

I shrug my shoulders. "It just doesn't feel right you know, wearing clothes I bought with Shin that he picked out for me. I can't wear them on my first official date with Hiroshi."

"Can I ask?" I look to see the conflict showing in Kyo's brown eyes. "Maybe I shouldn't."

"Man Kyo. I would seriously be screwed if you couldn't ask me anything. You know I will always tell you the complete truth, no matter what you ask. It's about Shin right?" I watch him nod his head. "Ask away, I can't hide shit from you."

"I just was wondering, how often do you still think of Shin when you look at Hiroshi?"

A deep sigh escapes my lips.

"That many?" Kyo asks quietly.

"I still think of Shin every fucking time I gaze at Hiroshi. Please don't tell him that. I know he hates the whole Shin topic, he thinks I will just push him aside and run back to him."

"Ren how can you date Hiroshi then, if you only think of Shin? Isn't that kind of cruel to him?"

"No it is. I am being a complete selfish asshole." I shove my hands in my jean pockets, as the mall enters our sights. "I don't mean to though, Kyo. I truly am trying my hardest to move on. It's just like our whole date Saturday, out of everywhere in town, he picks the one restaurant where me and Shin spent all our dates."

"Do you plan to tell Hiroshi the truth?"

I look into his dark brown eyes, through his glasses. "Yah I do. I just, I'm not ready to talk about it."

"Well you're lucky that he is willing to wait for you." Kyo smiles.

"I am too lucky, I feel guilty. I am basically leading him on, pretending that when I am with him I see him. Why am I so fucked up in the head? Here I have this perfectly amazing guy who wants nothing more then to be with me."

"Well you and Shin were together for what? Almost two years?"

"Yah, he wanted nothing more than to take me out on his 18th birthday, and show me off to the world and his parents. But we never even made it until then. I thought Shin and me, we would make it you know? I thought he would be more than just the typical high school love. I thought he could be that one, the one guy I spend my life with. I pictured us moving in together in a small apartment, heck! I even dreamed about us getting married."