BTS SMERALDO THE NOTES 1 (Edited & Translated)

Yoongi: 28 July Year 22

The Direction Where the Sun Rises
Part 4

I could finally manage to get up in the afternoon. I suffered from sever chills for two whole days after coming down from the mountain. I couldn't remember anything from the past two days either. The only thing I could recall was having a fever and chills. I slipped in and out of consciousness mostly.

My sheets were damp with sweat when I finally got up. I felt slightly giddy and delirious. I decided to go to the hospital to get an IV. I needed it. I tried to eat, but felt bad doing so.

I checked out chat group when brushing my teeth and saw that Jimin had left a message for Hoseok. There were no replies.

I left after the IV was done and I felt stronger. I made my way down the railroad to the bus stop. I noticed an unfinished building looming ahead. They'd stopped construction a while ago.

I passed the building and I decided to stop in front of the music store. My mind was quiet for once. I heard no flames eating away at my home, the piano. I didn't stoop down to find a rock to throw at the store this time either.

It felt so unreal that I'd even wrecked this store window. I wondered if that had really happened. I looked at the piano on the other side of the window.

"Don't you see we're all hurting too? Don't you see that?"
Again. Hoseok's words.

That day was a mess In my head. But I remember thinking he was in a different state of mind in that moment.

Of course, he'd been angry before. But he'd never been so on edge as he'd been that day. He'd always pushed and pulled and encouraged me every time I fell. This time it was different. Why?

I checked the group chat again and read over Jimin's message.

"Where are you Hoseok?"

Several hours had gone by and Hoseok still hadn't answered

I'd let Hoseok down. I could see that now. Something inside me felt restless. An uneasy feeling settled in my stomach.

Hoseok always got angry and pushed us around. He was loud when he was angry. He always showed his anger. He got it all out.

But all he had now was silence. He'd turned the other way. He never did that until now.

And he was always the one to leave the door open for me to come back. No matter how far astray I'd gone, he'd always be the one to lead me back.

But not this time. It seemed irrevocable this time around.

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