Dear Katharine

December 20, 20xx 7:28 p.m.

Dec. 20, 20xx
7:28 p.m.

Dear Kath,

                  I haven't written yesterday because after I told Mama what happened the other day, she decided that we join Papa abroad immediately so we had to fix all our papers as fast as possible. She said this place is no longer safe so we have to leave. He already talked to Papa and he agreed that it's best we leave the country.
                   I told Rob about my parents' plan and instead of comforting me, he said he envies me for being able to escape this wretched place. I also told Jenna and she shares the same sentiment Rob has. But I don't want to escape. I want to fight. I want to fight for justice.
                   I'm not sure if I agree with Mama's decision. It feels like we're running away again like we did when lolo died. I don't know what to do.
                 Mama skipped church today because she is busy calling people she knows to speed up everything we need so we can leave before Christmas. So I went to church alone. It's weird that I still go to church even if I don't believe in God anymore. I guess it has become my habit that I struggle to kill.
                 I arrived a little late. Father Andrew was already delivering his homily. And I don't know why, but all his preachings are what I need to hear every time I'm feeling hopeless, angry and confused. Can he read my mind? Or is God  messing with me? It's just that, today Father Andrew's message is about detours and setbacks—the ones we cause like Jonah and the ones we have no control of like Joseph.
                 “When we experience detours, we are either Jonah or Joseph. We either cause our own them or they are God's plan for the greater good,” he spoke in a distinct low voice I shall surely miss. “Jonah, when God ordered him to go to Nineveh to preach repentance, escaped God's calling for him. While Joseph was sold by his brothers as a slave to Egypt. But no matter what they have in common is that God fulfilled His plans nonetheless.
                “We may be like Jonah, who wilfully disobeys God, or Joseph, who God seems to have abandoned. Whoever you are do not lose hope for God will make His plans and promises come true. Let us pray.”
                I do not know what God's plans are for me. I don't even want to expect anything from God because I feel like I will only be disappointed.
                Wait, Mama's shouting. I think she has some news to tell.