Bi-stressed

CHAPTER 79

As soon as I reach, I plug in my phone to charge and throw myself on Zac's bed.

"This is your house Lexi." Zac says, as he lays next to me.

"I can't stay here Zac." I state, turning on my side so I can face him.

"There's just few years left anyways."

"If you're talking about marriage, no. There's a long way to go Zac. I can't stay here till then. I need to speak to Halsey and Aunt Steph about staying there and oh my gosh what about my school fees." I sit up realizing I have no financial support.

How can a mother do this to her child.

"Lexi, calm down. We'll figure it out. You don't need to stress."

"My mother chose him over me." My heart hurts at the reminder of last night. I wonder if my mother is thinking of me at this moment or thought of me at all.

"Lexi?" Zac says, cupping my cheeks.

I nod.

"She is your mother. She loves you. She must be really out of her mind that time. When she'll realize, she'll definitely come back for you."

"No mother will ever think of throwing her child out of the house and especially when her daughter has experienced a rough childhood. Also, I'm never going back."

"Why don't you ever tell me about your past?" Zac asks, full of concern.

"I don't know. I never wanted anyone to know."  It's not fair that I told Hardin but not Zac.

"It's not fair that you want more of my past when you give me nothing of yours Lexi."

And so I give him. I give him every detail. I tell him about my mom's affair, about the every day fights, the hammering and screaming and finally about my dad commiting suicide. "Two years after my dad's death, she married the same guy who was the cause of his death. I blamed her for everything. She killed my father. She and her husband killed my dad, Zac. But I forgave her. During this lent, I finally tried building a relationship with her but she ruined it, she ruined us once again. I hate her."

Is it even possible to hate the person who's given you birth?

He takes me in his lap and squeezes me tight. When I look up at him, he's crying. I run my fingers across my eyes but find no wetness. I'm not crying, not a single drop of tear. This is the first time I didn't cry while telling this story. My heart is crying though. It throbs.

"Why are you crying?"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you. You've gone through enough already. I had no idea it would be so bad. I'm so sorry for your dad."

"I don't want you to feel sorry for me. I don't need sympathies Zac."
He squeezes me tight against his chest.

"Zac?"

"Yes."

"You told me your mom died when you were just two. How did she-?"

"Lexi, please. We're never discussing this topic ever again."

"Okay." I don't want to force him. It must be hard for him too. Growing up without a mother's love and care.

"I'll just check on my phone. I haven't used it since before we left for the picnic."

As soon as I switch my phone on, a multiple notifications blow up my phone. 42 missed calls. 23 from Halsey and 19 from Louis. I immediately call Halsey and am relieved when she picks up on the first ring. She asks where the hell was I and so I tell her a brief version of the story which took place at my no-longer-house. She seems angry that I didn't come there so I tell her that Zac took me home after mom threw me out of the house because it was too early to come there. I told her that I'm currently at his place and that he'd drop me by evening. She refuses to wait that long and is on her way to Zac's house.
When she arrives, I tell her the story in detail.