Bi-stressed

CHAPTER 57

My eyes open at 2 pm and I'm surprised at how long I've slept. I get off bed and stare at the mirror, noticing the dark circles under my eyes. Yesterday was bad. Gotta make the best of tonight. There will probably be no drinks at a 16th birthday party but knowing Elaine's family, I guess there will be. Her parents are fun, unprejudiced and extremely chill about drinking as long as one isn't completely wasted. Even though I'm still underage, I drank a few times before, not getting drunk of course, not to have my mother kick me out. Drinking just makes me feel closer to my dad even though I despised it when he was alive and getting drunk. Now I seem to have a really good connection with it.

Zac.

Has he called or texted? I hope he has. I go to check but there's nothing. I hope he's okay. I call him but it again goes to voicemail. He should have atleast dropped in a text. Why would he anyways unless I change my mind from going for Elaine's birthday. But no, I am going. She's a childhood friend of mine and I will definitely go no matter what happened. He shouldn't ignore me. He can't do this. He can't stop me. I'll go wherever I want to.

"If you go, never talk to me again." His words play in my mind.

Maybe I should have listened atleast we would be talking right now. No he doesn't get to threaten me this way. He did it before with Luna but that was just because he was insecure. He had a reason. This also does have a reason, he must be wanting to protect me from her. But why should he protect me from her. I'm old enough to protect myself. And so if I want to go, he can't stop me or threaten me to never to talk to him again.

He's so jealous and possessive. And dominating. My subconscious reminds.

I decide to take a shower and then go up to his house. We can talk it out. He doesn't have to ignore. I have to make him understand that it's my life and I do what I want to. I don't have to listen to everything he tells me. It's so not right. We could compromise at times but it can't work out like this. He can't just tell me what to do.

As the hot water trickles down my body, the thought of Hardin being at the party sends shivers up my spine.

How nice of Hardin being Elaine's very close friend now when before she was the reason he didn't want to date me, because he had some issues with me hanging out with her.

The situation was different then. My subconscious defends him.

I hate him, literally.

I was such a fool to fall for him then when in return all I got were hurtful and sarcastic comments. Now here he is kissing me and acting all concerned. He had a chance to do this then but he didn't. Now I have Zac and he's just messing around with my relationship and provoking my feelings for him. Why now? Is this some plan of his? To make me leave Zac and fall for him and then when he's done, toss me away.

I still remember that night at Elaine's house when I was hanging out with the group which included Elaine, her sister Erica, Kim, Shawn, Melissa, her boyfriend Calum, Jerry who's migrated now, Hardin and me. We were playing Truth or Dare and Cal dared Hardin to kiss me. They all hooted when he stood up from that very couch I remember, walked over to me and bent down to where I was sitting, his hand placed on his bent knee, he said "Dying for it? Guess you aren't my type." At that moment I felt humiliated infront of the whole group and I swore to never hang out with them if he was there. It's been 2 years since that.

The very next month this guy shifted in our area, just two lanes away from my house. I knew him on the internet but the first time we met was at the bonfire in the church grounds. Elaine watched as he stared at me sing over the music and didn't move his eyes until mine met his. My first encounter with this guy named Zac was that very night, when he grabbed Hardin by the collar and made him apologize for spilling beer over my top. Then after, we spoke and he was the one to make me realize I was too good for Hardin when I told him all the hurtful things Hardin said and did to me despite how I felt and cared for him. We spoke till 6 am and that's when I realized I started to fall for him. Then we dated just one day before Luna could ask me out. He was so different then. So kind and understanding, never forcing me to do anything.