EXES AND OH'S

Sagittarius

I roll on my front and bury half of my face onto the fluffy pillow, trying so damned hard to go back to sleep again as I was awakened by the blinding light coming through the windows in my bedroom. 

Jesus Fuck. I feel so sore, so hot, so uncomfortable, and I'm sweating all over. Why does the California summer sun have to be so effin' brutal? 

Wait, what time is it already? I'm pretty sure I set off the the alarm last night. Unless...

All the grogginess in me has dissipated in an instant. I quickly reach for the side of the bed, checking if Levi is still asleep. And, son of a bitch, I'm alone in my bed. I finally open my eyes and sit up abruptly, just like how Nosferatu did when his coffin was popped open. I narrow my eyes and check the time at the digital clock on top of my bedside drawer, 10:52 AM. 

Motherfuuuuuck!

"Levi!" I screech, already scrambling myself out of bed and quickly putting on my robe. I storm off into the bathroom. Nope, he's not here. I reach for my toothbrush from the glass holder on top of the sink and furiously brush my teeth, then do a quick round of mouthwash before I make my way out and stomp angrily into the living room and kitchen. 

I dart my eyes around and see Major Asshat chortling and chatting up with Kurt while 'Believe' by Cher plays through the speakers — which totally reminds me of my dads. Phil and Tim love, love, loves Goddess Cher.

"Hey, morning." Levi chirps, all-smiles at me as his green eyes meet my scowling deep browns. He goes around the kitchen counter and leans down my face for a kiss, which I dodge.

"Levi, did you fucking turn off my alarm?!" I sputter, flying off the handle. "I'm so frickin' late for work already! And on a Monday! Do you have any idea how heavy the traff—" 

And he shuts me up by pressing his lips to mine, successfully this time, sliding his arms around my waist and pressing my body hard against his. And hot diggity damn, all I can do is swoon and surrender. I inhale profusely and let Levi's pheromones invade my senses. Right now, his scent is somewhere between a sex god and freshly-baked bread. I know, weird, but it's making me so fucking hungry, hot, and horny for him. But I'm still mad, like — crazy, horny mad.

Levi breaks our kiss and lowers his face on my neck, leaving soft kisses on my jaw and trailing up to the space behind my ear. "Nope, I didn't turn off your alarm. You must have slept through it." He mumbles before my ear, then gently bites and tugs on my earlobe. I know he's doing all this kissing and teasing so I could forgive him for keeping me up all night and for not waking me up earlier. Well, it will take more than cute little kisses to pardon his ass! 

"Ugh! Levi, you should have woken me up! You're so friggin' stupid and annoying!" I grunt and sigh. I seriously cannot believe this. I've never slept through an alarm before. I eye Levi from head to foot and notice that he's wearing Kurt's tiny taper-fit shorts and Silverstein shirt. It's one or two sizes smaller for him, and he looks weird. Hot, but weird. "And are those shorts supposed to hide your belly button but not your balls?" I ask Levi, snorting derisively.

"Yeah, my clothes are in the drier, so Kurt let me wear these cause he didn't want to see my penis." He does a finger quote and snickers. "And we've been here in the kitchen since dawn. I was helping him out knead dough and bake some shit. Right, Kurt?" He beams innocently and turns his head to look at Kurt.

"Yaaaaas, bitch!" He hollers, pulling out a baking tray with different types of bread from the oven. Okay, so that's where the whole wonderful, homey, bakery aroma is coming from.