crave

fifty-two

*dracos pov*
i watch as blood pours out of elizabeth. i watch as i see the color fade from her skin, the life fade from her eyes that stare at me. i hear her draw for a last breath as she falls to the ground. her hands cover the wound and mine hold the knife. i look down at my shaking hands, her blood covers them. the knife that is also covered in her blood drops to the ground. i killed her.

i wake up, sweat dripping on my skin and my breathing is heavy. i don't know where that dream came from. i would never hurt elizabeth. not like that. it almost killed me to push her out of my room the other night. i wouldn't kill her. so why the dream? the dream of me stabbing her and being proud of it.

*elizabeths pov*
as i walk along the corridor back from dinner the image of last night flows through my mind. the ground getting closer as thoughts of my life run around. i try to push it away, i try to forget the feeling of my heart beating out of my chest, the feeling of the wind whipping against my face. "you alright" i hear someone say and i look over to see esmeray walking beside me. "are you stalking me" i laugh and she shakes her head "answer the question" she says. "i'm fine. why" i ask and she shrugs "you just seemed off, i guess. just letting you know that if you need to talk i'm here. and i won't tell any of the others about it" she says and i smile. "thank you. but i don't need to talk. i just need to figure some things out" i say and she sighs "okay, well i'll see you later i guess" she says as she turns around and walks away.

i'm glad i've started meeted people outside of slytherin, every slytherin is friends with draco or always wants to talk about draco. it's like i can't escape him. i walk into the common room and sigh as i sit down on the couch. there are a couple people at the table across the room but they pay no attention to me. "slut" i hear someone cough and i turn to see pansy. i roll my eyes as i turn my head back to the fire place. i stare at the red flames, swaying around and just burning everything down with them. sounds like me right now.

"cheater" another cough "if you have something to say to me, pansy, then say it. don't have to cough up a fucking lung just to tell me how much of a whore i am" i snap as i look at her. she scoffs as she rolls her eyes "getting angry, elizabeth" she teases as she stands up. "aw is someone calling you names" she asks as she steps infront of the couch. i do my best to ignore her as she continues speaking. "is that why you cheated on draco? because you can't handle him. i know how he is in bed, with the names. but personally i love it" she says, images of them fucking are thrown into the mess in my head. "shut the fuck up, pansy. you don't know shit" i spit out and she laughs "or can you just not handle yourself? any guy that shows you any affection you'll just give it up so easily? fucking slut" she laughs. before i can control anything i'm standing up, pushing her against the wall and my wand pokes at her throat.

"you don't know anything about me, pansy. you don't know about my relationship. my family. my sex life. nothing. so just shut the fuck up before you embarrass yourself" i seethe and she spits in my face. "go pitch yourself off the astronomy tower again, elizabeth, because draco's never going to give you a second chance" she says and i freeze. she saw? who all knows? is that why esmeray was trying to ask if i was alright?

people around us stare as i back away and pansy scoffs. i turn and see draco in the doorway, his eyes move between us. everyone knows. a tear slips down my cheek as i turn around and walk up to my room. i shut the door and slide down it, my back leaning against the wood. did everyone know? if so how? who saw? who would watch and not stop me? they just didn't care obviously. i don't blame them, i didn't care either. i shake my head as i lean my head in my hands. tears drop on the floor as they drip out of my eyes. i run my fingers through my hair, trying to calm myself down. i need to shower. i need to sleep. i need to eat. there are so many things i need to do but the only thing i'm actually worried about is talking to draco.

*dracos pov*
i watch elizabeth walk up to her room. is what pansy said true? did she actually jump? i know she had thought about it before but i never thought she would actually. if she did, who stopped her? i look at pansy and she laughs as she steps from the wall "did she actually jump off of the astronomy tower" i ask. i can't help but think how much pain she had to be in to want to jump, what pushed her over the edge. her own mistake? "yeah, astoria saw it. she said she was inches from the ground before she pulled out her wand and stopped herself. afterwards, she just laid there apparently. pathetic slut, couldn't even go through with that" she laughs before sitting on the couch.

i picutre elizabeth falling off of the astronomy tower, her hair flying, her eyes watery, wondering if she wanted to stop, thinking about her next move. i can't help but want to speak to her, ask her if she's okay. but i can't. she did this to herself. she cheated.