• Forever •

Chapter 39

Chapter 39:

"Peeta!" I shout.

He comes into the living room carrying a large box. He carefully sets it on the ground.

"Yeah?" He says out of breath.

"Is that the wreath?" I ask.

"Yeah..." He says apprehensively.

"I said to get the ornaments and garland first." I say in a whine.

"Well this was in front of the ornaments and garland."

Peeta and I have been decorating for Christmas which is a week away. He's been going up and down the stairs all morning getting boxes from the attic which we'd taken from our old houses after we won our first games. We picked out a tree last night from a local lot and we're just about done with the house decorations.

"Okay. I'll be right back with your ornaments." He says exhausted.

"Thank you honey!" I say.

"Yeah, yeah." He says waving his hand.

I've already put garland around the stair railing and fireplace, hung our stockings above the fireplace, put little knick knacks around the house, and the last thing to do is decorate the tree.

Peeta comes down a few minutes later with the box.

"This is the last one." He says putting it down.

"Okay, shall we get started then?" I say in a funny voice.

"Yes, we shall." He says in the same tone back.

We put the red and gold beaded garland around the tree along with some lights. We then hang the ornaments all around. I top the tree with a star and Peeta plugs it in. We put it next to the fireplace. It looks so homey in our house. I never thought it could look like this.

I look over at Peeta and see he looks kind of nervous. I've been paying close attention to him since he got back from the Capitol. I'm just so worried he's going to have another episode.

"Peeta?" I ask him.

He looks over. He has small beads of sweat near his hairline.

"Yes?" He says.

"Are you feeling okay?" I say touching his arm.

"I'm fine. I'm fine." He says.

"No you're not. Come on, sit down." I say leading him to the couch.

"No Katniss really, I'm alright. Let's go make dinner." He says.

"Okay." I say warily.

He's slicing bread when I see his body is tense. His arms are shaking.

"Peeta?" I say trying to get him to stay focused. Trying so hard not to let the lies and confusion pull him under.

He looks up. He looks lost. Disoriented.
"Yeah?" He says.

I go across and take the knife from him.

"Peeta please. Look at me." I say taking his face in my hand. "It's me. Katniss. Stay with me please. Don't go." I plead. "Peeta. I love you. Please Peeta. I love you. I love you. I love you."

His body becomes less tense and he caresses my cheek.

"Katniss?" He asks. "Is that really you?" He asks in disbelief.

"Yeah, yeah it's me." I let out a sigh of relief and smile. "It's me." I whisper as I press myself into his chest.

We stand there holding each other for a while.

"How about you go lay down while I finish dinner?" I say.

"No it's fine, I'll finish." He says trying to reach for the knife again.

"Peeta no, let's go." I say taking his hand and practically dragging him to the living room couch.

I put a blanket over him and sit down beside him. I stroke the hair from his forehead and stare deeply into his blue eyes.

"I love you." He says sweetly to me.

I blush and smile. "I love you more." I say.

"That's impossible." He whispers.

"Nothing's impossible." I reply.

I give him a soft loving kiss and go try to finish cooking.

While I'm cooking fish fillets, I start to think about our future. After today I don't know if Peeta could be left alone very long with the baby. What if he were to have and accident and hurt himself or the baby and couldn't take care of him or her?

In the end I decide that he'll be just fine. Peeta will be such and amazing father, I have nothing to worry about.

I hear a small whimper coming from the living room. I think I just imagined it until I hear it louder this time.

I walk in to see Peeta with a steady stream of tears down his cheeks. He's still sleeping though. I kneel down next to the couch and try to wake him. Finally he wakes up in a start and stares at me for a few seconds before embracing me tightly.

"Oh my god." He says stroking my hair.
"You were dead. I killed you." He says.

"Peeta, it's okay. Shhh it's alright I'm here. I'm here." I keep repeating.

He lays back as stares at me for a while.

"Do you realize how beautiful you are?" He asks.

"Peeta stop." I say.

"No I'm being serious. It's like wow. I don't even have words." He says taking me hand in his.

"Are you okay now?" I ask. "Dinners done."

"Yeah, I'm fine now." He replies.

We eat dinner and talk about upcoming Christmas plans. I can't wait till Christmas morning to tell Peeta I'm pregnant again.

He looks over and me and flashes a thankful smile. I return it and get the same stirring in my chest I got on the beach, when I started to fall for him.