• Forever •

Chapter 50

Chapter 50:

The day of Addy's birthday party is insane. Not only was it 94 degrees out, but it rained all day. Perfect August weather here in district 12.  Peeta had to cover her cake in garbage bags just to get it out of the back door of the bakery, to the car, then back into our house, getting drenched in the process. We decorated the house while she was still sleeping this morning and had everything ready for a lunch time party.

She came downstairs really groggy and still in her pajamas. She walked right to the island and climbed up into the stool, obviously not realizing it was her birthday. Me and Peeta stood there smiling at here like idiots. "What?" She said.

"Happy birthday!" I said.

She looked around at all the decorations. "It looks so pretty in here. Can we keep it like this?"

Peeta laughed. "No honey, we can't. Just for your birthday." He said.

"How about we go get dressed for your party and daddy can go get grandma and uncle Haymitch?" I said giving Peeta a look to indicate him to grab and umbrella and go get my mother and Haymitch.

Peeta gets the umbrella and heads out. Me and Addy go upstairs to get her dressed. As I'm going through her closet we pull out dresses that she thinks she might like. I already know she's going to pick her favorite blue one with sparkles and tule at the bottom. That and her favorite blue bow. As we're trying on the different dresses she looked at me with the most innocent eyes.

"Mommy, why can't I have a brother or sister?"

This time I don't have Peeta to save me from this one.

"Sweetie, I know you really want a brother or sister, but you have to be patient and wait. It doesn't happen right away or right when you want it too."

"Okayyyy." She says in a whine.

"C'mon hon, let's go downstairs and start your party." I say.

She grabs my hand and we head downstairs and all I can do is replay our conversation in my head over and over until Peeta snaps me out of it.

He runs his hand down my arm. "Are you okay?" He says.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine." I say.

He gives me that 'we'll talk later' look.

We have a great time talking and catching up with my mom and Haymitch and Addy loves her gifts. Around 9 o'clock they leave and Addy is passed out on the couch. Peeta brings her upstairs to her bedroom and I head into ours. I change and sit on our bed. Tears welling up in my eyes. A few fall and I just sit there thinking about how poor little Addy wants a sibling and I am too sacred for another baby. Peeta walks and and sees me. Of course he comes to comfort me, it's what he does best.

He takes me in his arms and I hold onto him for dear life. I sob and sob until finally I talk. "Addy just wants a sibling so bad Peeta, so bad. And I feel like I've failed her because I'm scared."

"Katniss, she's just too young to understand. She'll understand when she older and the she won't  question it." He says smoothing down my hair.

I wipe my tears and look at my husband in the eyes. My strong, caring, loving and kindhearted husband. He slowly kisses me and I kiss back as well. The rest of the night is one big blur, but as I slowly close my eyes, I'm in a much more peaceful state.