IN ANOTHER LIFE (Pansy Parkinson x Reader)

Chapter 42 - We never had it from the start

PANSY'S POV

Last year of school was supposed to be memorable, Blaise told me that. So, I inhaled and looked at the building - the school where I spent more time than my parents' house. I looked around at the architecture, the magic, and mysteries that resided in this school. And I instantly concluded, I hated this fucking place.

I hate how school life is romanticized because I sure as hell couldn't wait to get out of here and start my life. I haven't thought about life after Hogwarts a lot. Well, to be honest, I haven't thought about it at all. The war was almost here, and wishing for something unachievable would be just putting up myself for heartbreak.

But if I were to imagine a life after school - it was always with Y/N. I would like to live in a small house with her, and I'd know I would feel at home. She would be my home. Yeah, this was my dream, my wish.

Most dreams don't come true, so I would not delve into them and continue to focus on the time I have left with her. And that was why, every night for the past month, I sat under the staircase and waited for her to join me. We don't do much besides sitting and talking till dawn and then, begrudgingly, we both depart for our respective dorms.

Every day, I looked forward to meeting her, since it was the only time when I could talk to her, touch her and not care about the people watching.

All day long, I just stared at the clock, waiting for the small hand to reach the number 10.

"The Carrows are becoming a pain in the ass," Draco commented. I cursed him for breaking my thoughts about Y/N.

"Your father will not be pleased to hear you say this, Dray," I joked, and he rolled his eyes. "They are renowned Death eaters."

"Yeah, neither my father nor the Wizarding World would accept me," he explained, "And you too for that matter, you know?"

"Oh, I know. My parents want me to woo you so that you would marry me," I teased.

"Do you want that?" he asked.

I scoffed in disbelief. Did he really have to ask that? "Merlin, no."

"Will you though?" He persisted. What was he talking about? I raised my brows, puzzled, and he sighed.

"Will you marry me?"

My eyes widened. This I did not see coming. My mind was full of questions, but before I could utter or even comprehend his words, he cut me off.

" Hear me out," he raised his hands in surrender, making me halt with my interrogation. "I can explain."

I exhaled, waving my hand at him, confused, waiting for the said explanation.

"The Wizarding world is conservative and it would never accept us, right?"

"Yeah, I know that," I nodded my head.

"Our parents will disown us if we come out, yeah?"

I nodded my head again, still unsure where he was going.

"So if we marry each other then they would be happy, and we can do whatever we want. Plus, I won't have to waste that poor Astoria's life. She deserves someone who loves her," He explained.

"And you want me to have Y/N as a mistress, as some kind of side chick," I joined the dots.

"Yes!" He cheered, "I wouldn't put it like that, but this way you can be with Y/N and I can be with Blaise."

"We'll always have to hide," I countered.

"I know, but we'll be happy."

"She doesn't deserve this," I thought out loud. She deserves someone that would show her off, someone that would cherish her, not hide her behind closed doors. I couldn't do that to her. I was trying to do good by her, and this did not come under that. A part of me knew this was the only way, but there had to be another. One where I could become the person she deserved.

"No," I rejected his proposal instantly. I didn't need to think twice. If I had an option to choose between her happiness and my selfish desires, I knew what I had to choose. "Besides, I think Blaise is straight. I mean, I don't mean to do this to you, but I heard him talk about asking Y/N out."

Immediately, he moved his gaze away from mine, focusing on something on the floor. "Wait a minute," I recalled, "You were there when he said that, weren't you?"

"Anyway, don't you have to go? It's almost 10," He tried to change the topic, but I took his arm in my hand. Was I missing something?

"What is it, Draco?" I pressed and he exhaled in defeat before muttering something.

"What, Draco?" I was growing impatient. I had to go see Y/N, but I also had to know what he was hiding.

"I might have told Blaise to say that in front of you," Draco confessed, still avoiding my gaze.

What? I didn't understand what he was saying, so I furrowed my brows further in bewilderment.

"I asked him to say that he was going to date Y/N in front of you," He explained in addition.

"Why?"

"Because you were doing this Lily Potter bullshit - I'll give up my life for her. I didn't want you to not be with her, Pans. You love her and as much as you deny it, I know you do. And you are my friend."

I hated how my eyes brimmed with tears at his thought. He had no right to interfere in my life like this, but his heart was in the right place, so I wouldn't hit him. For now at least. And it was the sentiment that mattered.

"Come here, you ass," I opened my arms for him to hug me. Smirking, he walked towards me before engulfing me in an embrace. "That was a nice thing to do, Dray."

"You're not the only person who's trying to be better for someone," He deadpanned, but I knew he was feeling mushy as well. It felt nice to have friends that cared for me deeply. I've never had that so to have people like Y/N ,Draco and Blaise in my life made me feel great. Instantaneously, I was hit with another set of questions.

"Do not interfere in my life again," I warned, playfully hitting him when we broke the hug. He chuckled, shaking his head and mumbling some incoherent words.

"When did you plot all of this?" I did not understand. I was always with Blaise and Draco. There was barely any time when we were apart.

He swallowed, clearing his throat. "I'm seeing Blaise. Well, he's not my boyfriend yet, but we're sort of sleeping together."

I hit his arm once more. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want you to feel left out," He accepted. "You know, third-wheeling and all."

"Also, Blaise thinks it would be cool if all of us could go on double dates together," Draco said dreamily, thinking about his not boyfriend. That idea sounded good - too good to be true. Both of us smiled at each other like the love-sick fools we were, yearning for the day when we could be happy.

Suddenly, Draco's smile faltered as he said out loud, "Double dates after the war."

The war. How could I forget the war?

We were never going to get those double dates - I was never going to get my wish because like I said; most dreams do not come true.

A/N - See you tomorrow!
With love,
Pri