The parts you leave behind

Chapter 48*

Hayden's POV

"Are you cold?" I ask while I wrap an arm around her shoulders.

She smiles a little and nuzzles her head in my neck. "It's May, Hall. I don't really think anyone is cold right now."

"It's a valid question when you're sitting near the water." I inform her as I tilt my head towards the 'beach' and kiss the side of her head. "Don't get snarky with me now, Rivera."

Chuckling when I playfully bite the side of her neck she turns and looks at me with amused eyes. "I can do what I want when you have no common sense."

"Now that's just rude, I have lots of common sense. But at that moment I was using common curtesy." I clarify with a firm nod. "And maybe I want to hold you closer, so just say you're cold."

She clears her throat slightly. "I'm freezing, brrrrr. Save me."

I eye her as I smile then pull her closer to me despite it actually being pretty warm out here but unless she's basically displayed against me I don't really feel complete. Not to mention I've been holding her close every second I can get, and I'm not letting go until I have to let go which I try not to think about.

It only makes me hold onto her tighter, as if I can stop it when the tidal wave comes to get her.

"I didn't ask you to act like Rose from the titanic." I inform her. "I just needed a small, 'I'm chilly' or something,"

"No."

"Oh, okay. That works too." I nod my head against her while I stare down at her face. I love her.

She hums in response as I continue to look down at her, and I take her in. She keeps complaining that she looks different, as if looking different could ever make her less beautiful when it doesn't. I could still stare at her all day long without a fuss, because as long as she has those green eyes and her smile then she's still her. Those are the two things I hold close to my heart everyday.

And I find myself appreciating little things about her nowadays. Maybe it's the fear of losing her that makes me pay attention to every little detail, or maybe I've just been trying the put my focus on something else. Who knows. But one thing I learned is that when you find out your significant other is dying, you feel like you're dying too. You can feel the knife stab you in your chest, and the knowledge of what's happening in the far future scared me, but hearing that it's almost here absolutely tears me apart.

"I have a secret to tell you." She abruptly says, and I meet her eyes. "I've been meaning to tell you for a few days but I didn't want to say anything until it was actually happening so you can feel it."

I furrow my brows. "What is it?"

"Well I was about to tell you." She grins as I watch while she grabs my hand then puts it against her stomach. "Talk to her."

"To the baby?" I ask.

"Who else would I be talking about?" She blinks slowly and shakes her head. "Talk to her, she likes when people talk to her."

I nod slowly. "What do I even say I mean..." I draw out before I bend down slightly then clear my throat. "Hey...how's your day?"

"Babe, this isn't a interview this is your daughter." Blair rolls her eyes. "I'm sorry sweetie, your dads a moron."

"Not a moron, I just don't know what to talk to her about." I send her a look before I sigh. "Do you think you'll like football? I'm going to make you a football girl. I actually taught your mom how to play football when we were little but she hit me in my no-no square and that was done with."